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My name is Wendell Grissom. I’m a death row inmate at the Oklahoma Department of Corrections in McAlester. I’ve been here since June 30th, 2008. 

I’ve been asked to write this with hopes of better educating the general public about the conditions within the state prison system here, especially for those inmates who are indigent, meaning they have no form of outside help from anyone. 

The conditions of how life is for incarcerated men and women, at least here in Oklahoma that is, vary from inmate to inmate. For instance, if you have a strong outside support system – meaning you receive financial support to help you “buy” what you need while you’re incarcerated – then doing your sentence definitely won’t be as rough for you as it will other inmates around you. For those who don’t have any type of financial support, they must simply do without. 

The general public has no idea what it’s truly like within an environment such as prison, unless, of course, you have been in one yourself, or have a loved one on the inside. Most of the outside world believes that everything one will need inside of prison is provided for them. Well, that’s just not true at all. The State portrays it does, through the media, news channels, telling everyone that inmates have everything they need, and people just believe it, so nothing ever gets done, nothing ever changes. 

And talk about politics, there’s more politics within the Department of Corrections than there is in Washington D.C., and that’s not a joke. The State is allotted a yearly budget for its Department of Corrections, to cover all the expenses, costs. And what they say they’re buying and giving to inmates… Well, it all looks great on the paper it’s written on, but where the hell is it all?!?! The simple truth is, like it or not, the system is literally swamped with corruption and lies, deception to the public. The money never makes it to the destinations it was given for. Instead, it ends up in the areas those running the system want it to go. Screw the inmates, just feed them beans and cornbread (and even then they screw that up, they won’t even halfway cook the darn beans!). Even the clothes we have to wear are sent in to us by family and friends, not supplied by the facility, like they would be normally. The prison allows your family to mail in clothes, towels and even bed sheets, as doing so saves the State of Oklahoma money, and that’s all they care about. And they will go pretty far to save. Just this past month, they came and installed a timer on flushing the toilet in each cell. Now we can only flush it one time, then you have to wait for five minutes before you can flush again. If you try and flush again before the five minutes is up, it’ll lock you out, and then you won’t be able to flush it for one whole hour. What the hell, man?! There are two of us in this cell!! It’s been horrible ever since they installed it, especially if one needs to go number two, know what I’m saying? But the system doesn’t care, and the public never knows the truth, because the system lies and no one is holding it accountable… 

But getting back to the point of this, what’s life truly like for an inmate…? What is it like after you’re sentenced to do time, once you leave the courtroom and enter into the prison environment? 

Well, as I’m an inmate myself, I’ll tell you, though I can only give witness to my own experience. But it’s the truth: I know it, God knows it, and the prison system knows it. The only people who might not know it is you, the general public, because that’s how the system is set up. The State doesn’t want you to know anything. But if you ask me, if I were on the outside, a law abiding, tax paying citizen – and at one time I was – I’d demand to know the truth, to hell with what the State wants. The tax paying citizenry has given them a job to do, but instead they’re doing it with an agenda of their own. The public needs to hold the State accountable for what it does, same as the State will most definitely hold them accountable if you break or go against the law. Isn’t that a double standard? Is our government saying the “law” is set one way for the citizen, yet it’s not the same for them, it’s somehow different? That’s what it sounds like to me. I was taught that the “law” is the same for everyone, every single person. So what’s really going on here? 

Well, I could literally go on, and on, and on, about all of that, but by now I’m sure you get the point: the system is corrupt. And who pays for it? The inmates do. They’re the ones who are suffering. It’s truly hard to describe what I see in here on a daily basis, but I’ll try to describe it the best I can… 

Go into your bathroom and shut the door. Then, imagine staying in that little space, not for an hour or two, but for days, weeks, months, years and decades on end, and in some cases, until you literally die, which where I’m at is the cold hard facts. Now, as I’m sure you can imagine, it’s horrible to say the least. All you have in that small space is a hard bunk to sleep on, and a toilet, absolutely nothing else. 

When an inmate first enters prison, they will be given a few basic essentials: 

  1. Three sets of State-issued clothing. 
  2. One blanket, one sheet, one pillowcase. 
  3. One worn out mattress and a pillow. 
  4. One roll of toilet paper. 

That’s absolutely all you receive upon entering the system, and the majority of it is well worn out, having been used by a number of inmates who have been here before you… 

You don’t receive any soap, shampoo, deodorant, a toothbrush or toothpaste; you don’t receive any kind of personal hygiene items at all. All of these much needed items must be purchased through the prison store, which we call the canteen. However, if an inmate has no money, then they’re not going to get anything at all. 

All the prison system provides is a single roll of toilet paper per week, and $11.56 per month for you to pay for everything else you need from the prison. That’s it. 

As for food, we’re given three trays a day: breakfast, lunch, and supper. But the food on the trays is so nasty one almost has to be starving in order to eat it, and it’s always cold and stale, mainly due to the correctional officers letting it sit on the carts out in the hallway for an hour or two before giving it to us. Never do we receive anything to drink other than at breakfast time. At breakfast, they serve us powder milk, but that’s it. Other than that, all we have to drink is lukewarm water out of our sink, which sits above our toilet. 

Not all of the correctional officers are this way, it’s about 50/50 really. But even still, the food is just not very appeasing to the eye (or stomach!) at all. And the sad reality of it is, for many inmates inside here, that’s literally all they get, period. 

So, as you can begin to see, if an inmate has no form of outside financial help, then they’re really in a bad place, hell on earth if you will. But it shouldn’t be this way at all. The State receives money from the Federal Government, it’s just not being used for the supposed intended purposes, the system spends it on other stuff. And who pays for it? As always, the inmates do. 

Our punishment is the loss off our freedom, not to be starved to death, and having to beg and plead for every little thing we need while in here. The system here doesn’t allow us to do any kind of work where we could earn money; if it did, things would be a whole lot different. But we have absolutely zero options to choose from, we’re totally dependent on help from the outside. Even for those who do have outside support, it’s rough in here, but not as much as it is for someone who has no outside support. For those inmates, they simply sit inside a concrete cell, wishing for, hoping for, somebody to help them. And the sad reality of it is, that’s basically 80% of the inmate population. I know this is probably hard for some of you who are reading this to understand, but this is our reality in here… 

As you can imagine, $11.56 doesn’t go very far at all. It’s sad to observe the ones who don’t receive anything, week after week, watch as other inmates get canteen and/or whatever it may be, and they’re left out. Some inmates in here will try and help others out best they can, but still, it’s not the same. I’ve met so many men in here who’ve lost all touch with any outside family, friends. I can relate to some extent on that too. Since I’ve been incarcerated here, not one of my “friends” has ever tried to get in contact with me, it’s like they’ve just totally forgotten all about me. It’s like this for many others in here as well. In fact, I’ve had pen pals who’ve helped me more than my own family has been willing to do, with, of course, the exception of my mother, she’s always been by my side. But if I ever lost her, well, I don’t think I’d hear from anyone else, ever… 

Okay, so, what does an inmate need? Well, let’s see, the following list is just some of the basic stuff that every inmate ought to be able to have, and what it’ll cost them, if they have the money… This is based on a months’ time (i.e. 30 days): 

  1. Two bars of hand soap: $1.30 
  2. One bottle of shampoo: $1.50 
  3. One tube toothpaste: 80¢ 
  4. Toothbrushes: 60¢ 
  5. Writing paper: $2.25 
  6. Ink pens: 35¢ each 
  7. Box of envelopes: $1.30 
  8. One book of stamps: $11.60 
  9. Vitamins???

These are the monthly items an inmate needs, but they also have to purchase additional items as well: a bowl, a spoon, a cup, extra toilet paper; all the basic stuff one needs to live. 

The prison system gives us none of this. And let’s not even get into food items and such; again, unless you purchase it yourself, with your own money, then you simply just won’t have any of it, period. You won’t have anything extra to eat and nothing to drink but toilet/sink water, period. Not just for that day, but for the entire time you’re on the inside. 

Also, the $11.56 a month has to cover other expenses you might have as well. For example, if for any reason you need to see the medical department, that’ll cost you $4.00, just to see them. If you need any medication, that’ll be another $4.00, for “each medication prescribed”. So, if you need to see the doctor, there goes your entire budget, now you won’t be able to purchase anything from canteen… 

Prison is a terrible place to be, and no one should have to go through it, but unfortunately some will, and how they’re treated while here will determine what kind of person they’ll be when, if, they ever reenter society. The system needs to better work at rehabilitating, not punishing, but that’s just not how it is in America, and because of that, I know a lot of anger-filled inmates who will soon be out in the world again, maybe living next door to you, brimming with years of hate and anger inside, from years and years of abuse received while being incarcerated. That’s what’s scary, if you ask me. The system is broken because it doesn’t focus on helping the offender. Instead, they make it worse by adding fuel to the problem, whatever the problem may have been. The future will only be worse than the past, unless something changes. So, to change the future, we need to change the people. Hate doesn’t heal anything, only love and forgiveness can.

I sincerely hope this sheds some light on how life is for an inmate who is doing time inside of a prison; it’s truly not good at all, no matter how one looks at it. 

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

4 Comments

  • John R. Cross
    January 16, 2023 at 10:21 am

    So how can one get money to someone that is on death row?
    “Remember those in prison, as though you were in prison with them, and the mistreated, as though you yourselves were suffering bodily.” Hebrews 13:3 CSV

    Reply
    • Rick Joslen
      January 30, 2023 at 10:57 pm

      Hey John,
      Go to jpay.com and follow their direction! Very easy.
      So glad you want to help

      Reply
  • Viola Homes
    November 22, 2022 at 5:09 am

    I care if their food is not nutrisepus, not enough to fill them up
    I care the warden dose not care to buy the food to keep them healthy and he could care less to over see it’s being prepared properly and that the prison will not hire enough guards so things like trays can be passed out right away. And there’s enough guards to over see their co workers safety and the inmates safety. Every thing written in that arrival falls on the wardens lack off concern for their physical health mental health and do sent think the sentence given is the punishment. Not starving not poor conditions. The people that don’t care haven’t been educated. And they don’t know how to help. I don’t know how to help I have a son on death row in Texas. He won’t see me so I haven’t seen it. But I have heard. What can I do to make it better? Write me 1145 south Church st. Mountain Home Ar. 72653

    Reply
  • Jeremy collins
    November 6, 2022 at 4:04 pm

    Ok I’m not unsympathetic too people in prison, doing time under horrible conditions. I did 5 yrs in Ohio #789048. I’ve been out about 8 months. But maybe describing the conditions and decrying abuse shouldn’t be about hygiene and commissary. The general public doesn’t care that people locked up for murder get bad food. They don’t care that the state gives you $11.60 to buy stuff you need, most don’t think the state should give you anything.. there are legitimate cases of murder by guards, abuse by staff, and people dying from extreme lack of health care. And in the vast majority of cases, the American public could not give a f&ck. You’re never going to make them care about this. He’ll I’ve done a decent amount of prison time , and I don’t care. No law abiding citizen ever will.

    Reply

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