MB6 2.0: And Now For Something Completely Different

As one of my favorite musicians, Bob Dylan, once said: “for the times, they are a-changin.” It is springtime and since I already clean my “house” with a persistence approaching the ritual, I thought it might be nice to give the old website a sort of Potemkin village spruce-up. I have actually wanted to do this for some time, but other matters seem to always take precedence. As you can see, gone are the days of having to squint in order to read tiny white letters on a pitch-black background. That whole color scheme was my idea, as it sort of fit the stark mood that I wanted to convey with the first iteration of MB6. It fit my humor, in other words, which was understandably dark. I started to get some complaints, however, not long after people started reading this train- wreck. Rather than fix the problem, I made the font even smaller, the black even deeper, and invested heavily in LensCrafters stock. Now that I have made my fortune off the backs of your broken eyeballs, I suppose I can graciously change the color scheme, I kid; in reality, I wanted it changed a while back, but it was more important to me that I not be a bother to my cousin, so it has had to wait until I could get her a little help. And the cavalry has indeed arrived: I would like to publicly thank both Tracey and Tonya (San-Fran Tonya, as I have far, far too many Tanya/Tonya’s in my life currently) for helping me convert the old html site to blog format. I was never comfortable asking my cousin Victoria to do more for me, as she has a life, currently working on her Masters and some variety of hush-hush project for one of the art museums in H-town. I am hoping this format will make the site less of a time-drain for everyone.

Blogging will also unlock some new functions for me. I have always wanted this site to be more media-rich: more photos, videos, links, articles, etc, which can help prove ant particular point I am trying to make. I can now accomplish this, and am currently “seeding” many old entries with additional content. This will include Spanish translations for most, it not all, of the current entries. I would ask all bilingual readers to please keep in mind that many of my literary references or “turns of phrase” only really work in English, and simple do not translate in Spanish. Any translation is, at best, an approximation. (gracias Dorothy para tu apoyo constante!)

For those of you few ur-readers who have been with me from the beginning, back when this site was more exclusive than the Garden of Eden, you will notice that we are reviving the short-lived email alert system. This time around, however, it is all done via RSS feeds, which are far more l33t anyways. If you would like to be informed when there is new content on this site, all you have to do is find the “Follow This Blog” dealie over there in the right-hand column, and click on it. Little magical elves will show up at your place, fix you a nice cup of tea, and fluff your butt pillow to maximize your viewing experience. There is also a slightly less creepy non-elf version, which I highly recommend.

Last but not least, I have authorized Tracey to open up the comments option. I do this with a great deal of trepidation, as I have seen the brutal, nasty core of the pro-death crowd, and I am not sure that they can help themselves from giving me their worthless two-cents. If you have an intelligent thought, either for or against me, that is fine. I’d rather minimize any sycophantic nonsense, if possible, as I am already deeply rooted in my beliefs of how awesome I am, and don’t require any additional ego boosts. (That was sarcasm, by the way…I know that some of you have no concept of the idea, so I thought I would help you out.) What I absolutely want to avoid are the ugly, retrograde, infantile hysterics I see invariably develop on the crime blogs. Both sides start with a few valid points, but then everything devolves into an ugly spectacle where every other word is something that you wouldn’t want your children to hear. Go do that someplace else. I don’t mind criticism, as only a fool believes he is error-free, but if your comments do not contain a certain level of penetrating logic or reason, I will ban you. If we can’t all be civil, and I have to spend more than a few minutes being your parents, I will simply turn this car around and shut the comment section down. Please don’t make me regret this. I have a feeling I am going to, as confusing the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. (As always, any comments requiring a response from me need to be directed to me via the mail.)

To paraphrase Horace, I hope this plays well in Corinth. I’m open to suggestions on how to improve the old girl. By my calculations, this site is about 22 months old, about to enter the “terrible two’s” of life. I find this image amusing, as I have some very nasty surprises in store for TDJC coming around the bend. When you trap a man between the gavel and the grave, do you really expect him to just lay down and die? You have made me vicious, this creature who is subletting the space where I used to live. Just because I have chosen to male physical violence anathema in my life does not mean I am not going to get my licks in, in other ways. Watch and see.

As a way of inviting some of you newcomers into my “public privacy” I have a few images for you. As you can imagine, there are not a whole lot of photographs taken from the inside of 12 building. The photos featured below were grabbed from a video which had a very short life online, wherein certain procedures for officers were videotaped for training purposes. If I can ever come across this raw footage again, I will link it here. Until then, these screenshots show a few aspects of my life. There are several which show two officers (wearing gray shirts/pants and black vests) standing in front of a cell. This is what a run looks like on DR. In the video, this is where the officers are asking for the offender to strip naked and pass them all of his clothes, which they inspect via the tiny door set about two feet off the ground. In the next image you can see an inmate (wearing white) bending down to allow himself to be handcuffed from behind. You do this every single time you leave your cell, even to go to the shower. In this particular image, you can also see what our sink/toilet look like, and the narrowness of the room, and the two little window slits in each of the doors. This space is all a DR inmate has to live in, and he spends every moment of his life there, save for the few hours of rec he gets a week. The next few images show the outside rec area, and the inside one. Again, once placed here, he is alone. Finally you see them passing a tray through the bean-chute in the door. I love that photo: the tray is just over flowing with food, and there even appears to be a huge slice of cake over there on the right. Haha, you assholes. Cake. On a totally unrelated note, the food does get much better when the state inspectors do their yearly evaluation. The cleaning crew actually cleans, the paint crew actually paints, and the AC is on. Life is almost bearable, for a few days a year.

Almost.

Death Row Run at Polunsky

Inspecting an offenders clothing after offender has stripped naked

Being handcuffed from behind before leaving a cell

Having handcuffs removed before outside rec

Inside rec area

Food tray

Full video