Death Watch Journal for Kevin Varga – DAY 44

I feel the need to tell you the unabashed truth rather than to fill you with falsehoods and candy-coasted truths that only serve to make you, the reader, feel good. That being said I will now write the poem…

These are the thoughts that have been going through my head today. I cannot understand why I have been thrown away to die, especially when I feel that I have something to share with the world. I want to scream out that this is all so unfair, but who will listen to me? Who will actually stop the Texas killing machine from spewing me out when they have their way? I believe in justice, I truly do, but the death penalty has not been about justice, but about vengeance. Texas courts have been giving you, the public, vengeance for the crimes that have been committed, but will my death bring back those men that Billy Galloway killed? Will his death? I tell you that it will not, nor will it bring closure to the victim’s family. You may believe differently but think for a moment and you too will see that if something that happened twelve years ago is once more brought to light it only opens wounds that have scar tissue to bleed once more. How then is this closure? I have stated before, and will continue to scream, that if I could bring those two men back from the realm of death, I would. I do not have this power. My death will serve not justice, but vengeance. I do not think the families of the two slain men are the types to want vengeance, but if they are, then I will go to my death knowing that I personally did not harm those people that they loved. My life is counted in days and I know the truth of my actions and I find that I can bear that burden.