Fight Another Day!

A Short Play by Larry Stromberg

[A spotlight shines on the center stage, darkness surrounding the lit area.

In the light are a chair and an old prison bed with some books and letters on it. The setting is a dreary prison cell.

A middle-aged male inmate enters the cell alone, emerging from the darkness center stage. His name is “Leo” and he´s wearing prison browns. He seems very distraught as he throws his prison jacket onto the bed with violent force. Leo then begins to pace the prison cell. He paces back and forth as if full of extreme anxiety.

Then he makes a sudden stop, grabs the chair and sits on it. Leo places his hands over his face and starts rubbing his eyes. He´s trying to hold back tears. He is a man about to give up on everything. Prison life has taken its toll. It can be seen in his weary eyes.]

Leo:
I don´t know how much more I can take. (Pause) I don´t know.

[Leo seems to be having a conversation with God.]

Leo:
How much more, huh? How much, Lord? (Pause) I´m tired. Very tired. (Pause) I´ve got nothing else to live for. Nothing.

[He begins to breakdown with tears.]

Leo:
You took my little girl from me.

[Leo points up to God above.]

Leo:
You took her. My beautiful daughter is dead. The person I love the most is gone. My Anna is gone. (Pause) It´s too much for me in this damn hellhole.

[Leo begins to cry even more.]

Leo:
My only child, man. She´s gone. (Beat) Dead.

[Leo thinks back on the day he held his daughter for the first time.]

Leo:
I remember the day Anna was born.

[Leo is thinking back to holding his baby girl in his arms. Rocking her back and forth very gentle and loving.]

Leo:
She came into this world with a smile on her face.

[Leo smiles as he imagines Anna in his arms.]

Leo: She smiled at me. She was my baby-girl. I was her daddy.

[Leo´s smile fades.]

Leo:
I was supposed to be her protector. Her guide in this life. Her father. (Pause) Instead I was getting high. Robbing. Stealing. (Beat) Serving a life sentence!

[Leo stands up in forcefully.]

Leo:
I don´t know what to do, what to say.

[He paces in the cell again like a caged animal.]

Leo:
There´s nowhere to go! Nowhere to hide! You can´t cry in this joint! You look weak. (Pause) You look weak.

[Leo stops pacing at center stage. His hands are down. The figure of a broken man. A broken spirit.]

Leo:
You look weak (Pause) I guess this is a part of the consequences of my sins. (Screaming out in madness) Leo´s sins!!! My crimes against society. The payback for killing that man to feed my heroin addiction!

[Leo slaps his right arm over and over again; to suggest putting a needle in his arm to get high.]

Leo:
All to get it on, huh?

[Then Leo pretends he has a gun in his left hand. Pointing it to rob, steal and kill.]

Leo:
I killed that man for only fifty fucking bucks! I put a bullet in his head, man.

[Then Leo lowers his head in shame.]

Leo:
A man who had a wife and three kids. I made a wife a widow. (Pause) That´s three little kids who will never know their father.

[Leo raises his head and looks forward, disgusted with himself.]

Leo:
I did that. I´m a murderer! A scumbag! A piece of trash! The scum of the earth! Me!!!

[Then Leo looks up to the heavens in his anger and self-loathing.]

Leo:
But why take it out on Anna? Huh? Why her? Why my dear Anna?

[The tears flow from his eyes even more.]

Leo:
Why Anna, Lord?

[Leo sits back down in his heavy grief.]

Leo: My Anna overdosed on heroin. She followed in her daddy´s footsteps. (Pause) I was never there for my little girl. Never. (Pause) She was raised by another man that molested her. I should have been there for her. I should have protected her. That´s what a good father does. (Crying) Aggg. Aggg. I couldn´t protect her. I should have been there for her. Instead of being in prison doing the wheel. Life without the chance of parole. (Pause) I should have been there for my Anna. My little beautiful girl.

[Leo talks to God even more.]

Leo:
Still, I was told she was doing good, Lord. She was in college. Had good grades. She had dreams and ambition. (Pause) I didn´t know she was a damn junkie like me. I didn´t know. (Beat) I got nobody now. I´m all alone in this war zone. My wife left me for another. For a piece of shit! My parents are gone. My brother Tommy is dead. My sister disappeared. My so called friends don´t want nothing to do with me. (Pause) This loss feels like when I was sexually abused as a boy. A deep hurt that will never go away. Something that will always be there in my nightmares.

[Leo looks up to the heavens again. His voice has an intense and aggressive tone to it.]

Leo:
But why take it out on Anna, Lord? Why, huh? All you want to do is to punish me even more, huh? More and more! That´s what you do!!

[Leo screams out in agony at God.]

Leo:
That´s the good God you are, huh?! The God of love, of peace, right? You took everything from me!

[He stands up and points up at God in his indignation.]

Leo:
You allowed the Devil to do this to me, huh? Just like in the book of Job, huh?! All you are is a schizophrenic, psychopathic, God!!! That´s what you are! A psycho!!! Right?! It´s the truth!!! You want me to suffer for my sins! You get off on that, don´t you?! Answer me, you son of a bitch?!

[He screams out even more.]

Leo:
Do you hate me that much?!! Do you, Lord?!

[He stands there with the tears flowing from his eyes. Full of grief and loss.]

Leo:
The truth is, I hate myself. I despise myself. (Pause) Why, Anna?

[Leo stands there broken and lost.]

Leo:
I can´t turn back the clock. I can´t take back the fact that I took a life. I can´t. (Beat) I´m sorry, Lord. I´m so sorry. There is no hope for me. My life has no purpose or meaning. I´m falling deeper and deeper into the abyss. I can´t take it anymore. I´m done fighting. Each day in this joint is sucking the life out of me. The penitentiary from hell.

[Anxiety rises in Leo.]

Leo:
The fight is over. I´m done fighting my case in the courts.  Every appeal and petition denied! Time-barred! I´m tired of being in this place – day in and day out. Stripped of my dignity and pride! Treated like a piece of trash. That´s what I am anyway. A piece of trash.

[Leo grabs a sheet from off his bed.]

Leo:
I´m coming to see you, Jesus! Yes, sir! It´s my time! I can´t be in this nut-house anymore with all of these crazy young bucks with tons of time trying to prove themselves in this place. Willing to shank you dead for no reason at all – just for looking funny at them.

[Leo starts to twist the sheet real tight.]

Leo:
I´m tired of these nut-ass guards telling me what to do! When to eat! When to shower! When to lock it up! When to do anything! I´m tired of the lock-downs and the strip searches. I´m done with it all.

[Leo twists the sheet even tighter.]

Leo:
I´m done with these psychiatrists putting me on different medications that make me feel even worse. Crazy ass side effects! I´m tired of being put in a P.O.C. cell naked for days – wearing a damn smock! I can´t wait for this long, dragged out commutation process! They’re gonna deny a murderer like me anyway!!! I´m done with it all.

[Leo wraps the sheet around his neck.]

Leo:
It’s time to end all of this. End the misery. Time to check out of this motel. (Beat) Maybe, I can make things right in the next life, huh? (Beat) I just want to be with Anna. I want to tell her I love her.

[Leo tightens the sheet around his throat.]

Leo:
It´s over. I´m done. Time to take my place in the sun. I´m coming to see you soon, Jesus!

[Leo starts to choke himself with the sheet wrapped around his throat.]

Leo:
(Choking) Aggggggggggggggggggg!!!

[He chokes himself even more. His face turning red. Saliva dripping from his mouth.]

Leo:
(Choking) Agggggggggggggggggg!!!

[Then, he stops. His face is red. Tears are flowing from his eyes. He´s coughing non-stop. He slowly removes the sheet from around his neck.]

Leo:
(Coughing) Agggg. Agggg. Agggg.

[Leo clears his throat. He throws the sheet onto the bed in disgust.]

Leo:
I can´t do this anymore. I can´t. How can I go on without Anna? How?

[Leo looks up to God as the tears flow from his eyes.]

Leo:
Why can´t I do this, huh? Why can´t I kill myself? Why won´t you let me die, huh? Why, Lord, why?

[Leo cries in his immense grief.]

Leo:
You have to carry me. Help me, Lord… Please, help me.

[Leo reaches over to his bed and picks up the Bible. He opens and reads out aloud.]

Leo:
Thou will keep in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on thee, because he trusteth thee. Isaiah 26:3…

[Leo looks up to God again.]

Leo:
You have to help me. Help me to fight another day! Just one more day.

[Leo wipes the tears from his eyes. He slowly stands up from the chair with the Bible in his hands.]

Leo:
I can´t do this without you, Lord. My life is in your hands alone. (Beat) Only you.

[He looks up to God once again. His face in the light even more.]

Leo:
You alone.

[He looks around the cell with weary eyes. He starts to back away with the Bible in his hand. He drifts into the darkness and disappears. The light shines on at center stage. Only silence remains.]