She
By Luis Marquez Prieto
She’s different, she’s not the person she once used to be. She now shows little importance when she speaks to me. We used to conversate on the phone, but that was a while ago. Whenever we do speak, I feel like a bore. She makes me feel confused and at time torn. She has so little to say to me, I no longer interest her anymore. Silence has become the main topic so I just cut it short. She likes to fill my head with promises, the same ones she broke before. I’ve caught up to the mind games, the bigger the toy, the bigger the void. She reassures me that I’m the only one for her but we both know she has multiple choice. She tells me that she loves me but I’m not so sure. This solemn individual ran and took my joy. I’m here as a man, to show you my choice. I choose to be free, to dance and sing. To appreciate life the way it was dished out to me. I hope you find your happiness, I hope you cherish that boy. I hope to also be appreciated like someone’s special toy. One must learn to love themselves so that they may feel joy. I have to be cautious on my decisions and just enjoy. She was once special, she used to sparkle without light. She was kind and considerate but that person flew by. She left me for attention that one can buy.
What Is It?
By Luis Marquez Prieto
You love me, then you hate me, your love is complicated like a quiz.
I try to sort shit out, but you be switching up like a snitch.
I’m a bum in the day time then I’m baby daddie around six.
You say that you want me but you still talking to your ex.
You promise to show me better but you still the same chick.
I bring up a situation and you end up complicating it in a sec.
You make me feel crazy, your ass on another tip.
Like where are the vibez my lady, we on two different trips.
You either forget what we talk about, then you throwing out my shit.
Your ass got short term memory loss cuz you forget what you spit.
Your reason isn’t understanding, your head already making up shit.
You tell me you love me then you text me fuck you & don’t call me, boy this is it.
Its like walking on egg shells, land mines and dips.
I sit there and swallow my pride and hold my anger within.
I look at a mirror and cry once again.
Posted
By Luis Marquez Prieto
Tatted up skinny boy posted in the pen. Looking at my elders like damn not again. I’m surviving deep in prison because the kid is deep within. Fighting on the yard so I’m aiming for the chin. I could’ve been at school but prison ain’t for wimps. So I stay secluded at the gym. Doing bar reps with grown as men. This life is painful, I weep when in bed. I close my eyes tight and wish once again. To be with my family, to be with my twin. I’ve missed all the parties that they throw for my friends. You see I’m only 26 & I’m doing life in the pen.
The Better Half
By Luis Marquez-Prieto
I’m a different individual, from the
One you once knew. This is the best
Version of me, clean cut & groomed.
My standards have been elevated, so if
You ain’t got a job, then we ain’t cool.
If you just trying to cruise? on by that
Ain’t me, that’s you.
If you can’t afford a pair of shoes
My nigga, then what the fuck is you
Doing boo. It’s like if losing
Is what you like to do. You went from
Riches to rags, but I understand
Cuz its what you’re used to.
I’m grateful for what you gave me
The opportunity to detach myself
From fools
I’m excited to work a 9 to 5 with no
Complaining cuz this new body of
Mine is capable of breaking
Any dude.
He’s Got My Back
By Luis Marquez-Prieto
I lasted for as long as I could. I strategically thought out every position and still ended up losing to you. I backtracked and tried to reevaluate my every decision, but at the end of the day, I would realize that I was just overthinking. I would sit there for hours and ponder, who could’ve been so mean and cruel to make you believe that you were not special and beautiful. I would constantly speak to God and ask him why. Why was I assigned to pick up the pieces, when I myself didn’t feel useful of being with the living. To be completely honest, I feel like God has a cruel way of making us confront our feelings. In all reality, I truly speak from experience. I’ve gone through some emotional catastrophes, but I can guarantee you that this won’t stop me from winning. Yes, I might be incarcerated at the moment, but that day that I gave myself to the Lord I can for surely say that I was floating.
Small
By Luis Marquez-Prieto
Small window, little light. I can see it, but it
Doesn’t burn as bright.
Small sundeck, tiny space. I walk outside and
Feel the sun on my face.
Small waist, tight chains. They announce their
Orders and lead the way.
Small room, uncomfortable chair. The judge doesn’t
Even look at me but my mom is there.
Small faces, cold stairs. They see a hardened
Criminal, but in reality I’m scared.
The world is small on the way it thinks. They don’t
Ask the right questions, they no longer believe.
They’ve given up faith. They’ve given up on my
Dreams.
Small hearts. Evil thoughts. God shall forgive us
For all that we’ve done.
Why Daddy
By Luis Marquez-Prieto
Dad’s been drinking, so its time to be
Quiet and hide the fun.
I better get to the hiding before dad
Jumps the gun.
Once he gets to yelling my heart starts
To jump.
I can already picture him stumbling,
Falling, and acting dumb.
My mind starts racing knowing mom
Isn’t going to come
I look up to the ceiling and pray for
Kingdom come.
Could someone please take my pain
Away, my body hurts, my bones ache,
The last time it happened was about
three days.
Its only a matter of time before the
Man kills me anyways.
The doorknob startles me and I feel
The devil’s presence come my way.
Then I feel this overwhelming feeling
Of just dying today.
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