No Second Chances?
By Christopher Clark
Trust me, trust me with you heart.
Trust me to shower you with a love you never thought of.
You trusted your ex giving him all those chances.
You left me when you got scared never giving me that advantage.
How could a Woman so strong be so weak,
So weak to not see that this so-called man would cheat.
Me never, trust and believe that.
I only wanted the best for you and your cloudy judgement didn’t see that.
Our first visit was the highlight of my night,
Me taking you as my forever was going to be the highlight of our lives.
Damn what happened to us? Was there not enough Trust. Not enough communication? What? Putting you in difficult situations? Why not express those feelings to the Man that has always wanted you. To fully understand what the hell you have gone through. You, you, you, that’s all I wanted MG. When you reached out to me it was such a relief. A relief to my soul baby, but you left and I tried and tried but it was now out of my control baby. I ask myself how could you still want to be with a Woman who has brought tears to your eyes? I don’t know the answer to be honest with you, but it would make me feel better if I could only hear her say “Chris I miss you”. Or “Chris you completed me. I never wanted us to be history. All this pain and misery is killing me.” Imagining you kissing me would light me up like a flashlight but only me and you would understand that. Jessie J, listening to that song like everyday. Your children is what drives you to become that super Woman and I support that but where is the beautiful Wonder Woman I fell in love with at? No second chances still? After all the feels, chills, bills, meals and you know I don’t even count that cause that’s not my type for real but for real MG is this how it’s gonna be? Me without you, you without me? Do it sound right? Am I worth the fight. It’s only so much fight I have left in me,
for me to understand that you don’t have time for me.
Too Scared
By Christopher Clark
Scared to give me your all MG? Are you scared or maybe petrified to fall MG? Why fight against something so real and authentic knowing that “I” was going to put my all in it. We’re so much alike but so much different. Our opinions yes but our visions, no. Out of all the guys you’ve dated I know for sho’ I’m the one you loved the most. How can I be scared of you? When I know your heart is a working process. I’m just as scared as you are, giving my heart to a Woman when it has been loved, abandoned, bruised, loved again, then neglected once more. You don’t think my heart is sore. Constantly working, pumping unnecessary love into someone who doesn’t deserve it. Now reliving it again like damn I thought I was over this. Hurting every night because the Woman I’m in love with is too scared to jump into my arms and give herself to me fully like I’m willing to? Jump baby, jump into my arms and let me have all of you. Every wound, every scar, every concern, all your doubts, all your insecurities and we just pour them in a cup and stir until we have one color. That color would be black of course because everything is one. When that’s done, me you and the kids would paint a picture so beautiful you wouldn’t even remember none of the colors that caused you all that pain. We goin’ make it MG. You just have let yourself go, don’t be scared of me. I know it’s going to be extremely hard when you’ve already done it and someone stepped all over your heart with no regards of your feelings. Crying every night with no one to hold you telling you “I’m here booby, you can count on me. Let me fight with you”. We won’t lose this war if we fight it together. The deck is already stacked against us MG. Friends in our ear, family, coworkers, exes telling us we won’t make it. Our love is basic. Girl don’t chase it. Why not say, “girl what you and Chris have is beautiful” or “You and Chris are meant to be”. Do you know what that would mean to me??….. That somebody believes in me. Believes in us, someone who genuinely cares but it doesn’t mean nothing if your too scared.
Fear
By Christopher Clark
You ever heard your heart scream out “trust him” but your mind is constantly whispering “fuck em” ? While your mind may be cloudy with false judgment and assumptions but in all actuality your lacking the ability to fully love him.
What type of person are you to fill your heart with pain and agony,
knowing deep down inside me and you were meant to be.
Vividly, I immediately see the future when I look into your eyes. You living through someone’s else’s experiences while your mind tells you lies.
You cry and cry asking this unseen God why is this happening to me? Why isn’t there a Man out there made ichispecifically for me and only me?
Instead you encounter users, abusers, and so called winners but underneath that cape their losers.
Mind you, I can’t even count on a hundred hands how many times you’ve been lied to. By exes, sending paramours inappropriate texts, disturbing messages, thinking that you’ve learned your lesson.
But no, you hold on to those memories, unfortunately missing out on that one thing you’ve longed for……A Man, a real Man that’s going to shower you with love, a love you’ve never experienced, a love you never even knew could exist. It’s too good to be true this has to be a trick. Your overwhelmed mind constantly speaking to you in a low tone telling you “girl leave him alone” or “go through his phone” or even “double back and see it he’s home”.
Really? After all the sacrificing, time and work you neglect your heart and choose your mind first? You RIP’ing our love and putting it on a shirt?
Because of fear? What, I guess your mind is talking over your heart now saying things like “don’t listen to him”. ” He’s just like the rest, all he wants to do” “SHUT UP! You don’t know him. He’s not like them”. Your heart now speaking. Mind now thinking who is this Woman talking to me like that. She doesn’t know I’ll have her back to square one, looking dumb?
Finally she snaps back and say “mind you’re right. Heart stay in your place, this is something me and mind has to face”.
Even though you’re right for me Chris, me and mind don’t wanna take that risk. Even though I’ve never been in love like this, me and mind don’t think we could coexist.
Even though you help me in so many ways, me and mind don’t wanna be played.
Even though you can make me see things more clear, me and mind only see one thing out of this and that’s ” Fear”.
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