My First Last Gulp
By Yassin Mohamad
I felt as if I ate my last hope
Rushing through prison life with my first last gulp
I thought Iit was just do a crime and receive a sentence
Attend al mandatory programs and repentance
Nah, it’s much more than that
Stay out of trouble,
Be patient and fall back
That’s all crap
So listen and read my facts
They use my kind to destroy each other’s minds
One side is angry
And the other is medicatedly fine
Some stand up for our human and prison rights
While others only stand up for count, singing:
“Everythang gon be alright”
I was labeled bitter and rebellious
When I was fighting for elders and young fellas
I ended up on Restricted Release List
Cause I have influence and the guards was scared and jealous
Now I’m in the hole being persecuted and disrespected
Same underwear for a week
No property and I still don’t feel regretful…
Just neglected
Reaching to my outside support
Family, law projects, prison society
HRC, the movement mag, and federal court
And some friends while filing grievances
I swear if freed I’ll never return to prison
And if you’re reading this
I truly mean this, ask Minutes Before Six
But will they let me survive this incarcerated war?
To once again embrace my family
And make love to that special girl
Out in the real world
Play with my grandchildren
And apologize to my kids
And educate society about the inhumane crimes DOC hid
This is something that’s true, season with pepper and salt
I’m not pointing the finger
Because maybe this will be my first-last gulp!
MY SOLITARY SURVIVAL
By Yassin Mohamad
So you want to feel my pain and all the shit I had to take?
Well open your heart eye’s as my pressure pipe breaks.
I been in prison since 1994,
When Commonwealth seeked to seal my freedom’s door.
Until the point I couldn’t see humanity no more.
I had the option to bend or stand,
Something like W-O connected man,
how about the actor in black clansman?
Seeing my fellow man go from Jamal to Jasmin,
to the young men now calling my generation – has been
The treatment I went through in jail,
Isn’t because I couldn’t make bail,
I been in solitary confinement since 1999-
Because of a mistake I failed.
So I had to rebel,
Cause there guards put me in a coffin to be nailed,
I called God by his every name- he didn’t answer
So I created my own heaven and hell.
I accepted my responsibility,
But D.O.C.’s doesn’t accept a man as myself humanity,
Beat and falsely charge me up and then offer me some Christmas candy!
Lie and say I assaulted CO SKI and showed my dick to nurse Sandy,
Place me on Restricted Release around D codes-
cause I still have some sanity,
And no doubt a whole lot of man sill in me.
Want me to lay down without a mattress or pillow,
Refuse my visits, mail and no phone calls-
Having my wife think she’s a willow.
But to society this can’t be real though,
Professional staff treating inmate bad-
Lying saying they’re rapist, homos, rats and weirdos,
Say it ain’t so.
You really wanna read and hear,
What happens indeed in here,
Uncut, desperate, courage, despair and fair,
Stress, losing weight and hair,
To the point you’ll do ANYTHING to leave this atmosphere?
So what I’m gonna do fight for my rights?
While I get beat down naked at night,
24 hours cameras not working now,
The PA the CO’s sister husband,
So nothing happen aiight?
Well on their paper it dind’t-
But to family, prison society, PILP and HRC I let it be known they did,
As inmate litigators uncover what they hid,
They secretly transfer from jail to jail-
To remove their body from the head
Something like the walking dead,
Where the professor dissect an adult to scare the kid.
I can go on and on and make this a book,
Especially how I was used by my captors as bait on a hook,
I was forced to eat what I took,
They made the inmates look,
Can you imagine being naked, soaked in mase-
Strapped in a metal chair, you’ll be shook.
However, I had to learn their game,
Inside I stored my pain,
Started educating myself so I can maintain,
So I used my brain,
As I hear the echoes of my grandmom voice- “Baby never forget your name”,
So I made a major change,
Started staying in my lane,
Where returning home wasn’t strange,
So I wrote and published my first book ALL ‘N to stay sane.
Now it’s 2024,
30 years past since I entered prison’s door,
My children is adults-
I’m a grandfather-
And things isn’t like it was before.
At times I feel unsure,
As I prepare to re-enter general population once more,
To finally exit the jail’s prison doors.
Happy Mother Nature Day
By Yassin Mohamad
From the source we all came from-
as God prepared the ultimate delivery called “woman”
Giving her the ability to produce and reproduce a life-
with the help of a counter part,
while also being a strong friend, lover girlfriend or wife.
A cousin, aunt, daughter and sister to a brother-
so special is a mom and grandmother.
Leave it up to me I’Il make this day an everyday celebration-
cause to be honest,
the youth need to truly understand a mother’s natural relations.
The utmost respect you earn-
for the labor calories you burn-
as you laid strong and stern-
fulfilling God’s mission was your only concern-
and with a few deep breaths and pushes,
you gave another human a life’s turn.
I’m so grateful and bless to see this in a woman like you-
and even fi you didn’t have any kids, I would still say…..
HAPPY MOTHER NATURE DAY TOO!
A Believer
By Yassin Mohamad
My morning begins with praising my lord-
true indeed I have another chance to strive some more.
To become the best takes patience, determination-
discipline and dedication will get me to my destination.
Check my survival kit that’s within myself-
correct belief, charisma, manners and actions off the shelves.
Remind myself how special I am-
the son of a strong mother and father with Iman.
When I step out the house, the sunshine upon me-
I can hear people whisper,
“That’s one of the believers.”
So I seek protection from Satan so I wouldn’t feel I’m showing of-
and continue to praise my one and only Allah.
Being a sincere believer nothing can compare to this-
I constantly pray for you to become a believer and enter heaven as my wish.
I know Allah won’t let his believers down-
so I humbly teach and spread the Holy Qur’an around.
And advise the people to believe and praise the one and only God-
because it’s the only salvation and natural high.
That’s Next
By Yassin Mohamad
The Countries of GREED,
The States of no REMORSE,
The Capitols of DEATH,
The Cities of MISTAKES,
The Counties of RACISM,
The Townships of REGRETS,
The Roads of LESSONS,
The Drives of DREAMS,
The Avenues of DECISIONS,
The Streets of LIFE,
The World is definitely FAILING!
NOW WHAT’S NEXT?
Keep Hope Alive
By Yassin Mohamad
I sat and thought about life,
how I’m ready to be a great husband to a deserving wife.
I was about to give up until HOPE came before my eyes,
that made me shed many tears not far from a cry.
I held up strong so my Hope will also stand,
keeping Hope alive is my priority and demand.
I can’t give up that’s not in me so I must continue to pursue,
some may not agree but it’s true it’s Hope in Me and You.
Oh Allah, strengthen me to keep Hope alive,
bond my words and actions so into love we can dive.
So it can be seen that there’s no drug more addictive then sincere love,
and this is ad u a that I send to the lord above.
The beauty of having Hope is that….
Hope is mine,
please know I say this daily a thousand times.
Hope is with me no matter what like my spine.
and I’m willing to die just to keep my Hope alive.
Sexy Valentine
By Yassin Mohamad
Damn Sexy Valentine, the decoration of my heart-
love flows calmly through my veins from the start.
I knew, I’d always wanted you to be mine-
as a friend, lover and of course VALENTINE.
Take what I have to offer that’s so true-
and understand how much I love you.
Not only for a second, minute, hour or decade-
but forever because our love I won’t trade.
For eternity you’ll be mine beyond measure-
and I’II be your life’s full of pleasure.
These words and emotions are real as time-
and no matter where we are,
you’ll always be my Sexy Valentine.
Let’s Talk Money
By Yassin Mohamad
Wanna speak to me ? Then lets talk money-
it’s what dictates the worldly moves, whether radically or humbly.
No huge muscles or big names-
no deep squad or pretty ass dane-
this is why I stay in my lane.
Okay, let’s talk money..
You know, big dollars with big faces-
purchase whatever you dream of that meet your taste.
Now, no disrespect to religion, so please forgive me God-
but truthfully money can turn a spiritual person eyes away from the sky.
I like nice leathers and reptile shoes-
including nice clothes and grand jewels-
shit, I can buy someone life if I choose.
I’m really a top-notch guy and some calls me narcissistic-
because I love me and enjoy talking about money that’s realistic.
I stay in the cut and let haters hate,
and watch debaters debate most of the time-
cause it keeps them out the way of my grind.
My extended family’s last name is Washington, Grant, Jackson and Franklin-
and oh! I forgot Jefferson and Lincoln.
So talk that money and I’m all ears-
because anything other then that is just blowing pollution in my air.
Aunties
By Yassin Mohamad
I know I haven’t been the best nephew-
but I tried and y’all know this is true,
especially when I say I love you.
Y’all spoiled me, but on my own I had to learn my lesson-
so l always thank Allah for giving y’all to me as a blessing.
I went from a gleeful newborn child with a winning smile-
to being labeled the most feared drug dealer at trial.
I know y’all wish things wasn’t like this- me in prison and dearly miss.
Do know I miss y’all as well-
however, understand that my choices was death or jail.
Y’all always told me to never give up and fight-
never back down when I’m right.
Not using your schooling as a justification-
but that’s how I earned a solid personal and family reputation.
Debbie, Nessa, Gumby, B, Cheryl, Titty, Ina, Kimberly, Sharon and Gail,
God knows that y’all the best aunts to have-
and please don’t let my imprisonment stress you out or keep you mad.
I’m y’all direct blood and I’m so proud-
I miss how y’all strength could move crowds.
There’s nothing for y’all I wouldn’t do-
and y’all voices never left how y’all always say “I love you nephew”
so believe me beloved aunts…
I LOVE Y’ALL TOO!
Woman King
By Yassin Mohamad
I felt you was the woman that was deserving of me –
my one and only Woman King.
The strength to my weakness that’s hidden
the knowledge to my ignorance that’s forbidden.
The female I only visualized and seen in my dreams –
my true and only woman King.
One that will represent my presence –
be mine & her image in my absence –
proud to yell that until I’m release you’ll always be the Queen and my woman King.
That female that welcome trials & tribulations along with any other test –
to show that like you any female that really love her mate can be queen and king at her best.
Right, wrong, good or bad,
betrayal and abandonment isn’t a thought when things not up and you’re mad.
Share my pain and feel the happiness of love that I have for you in my heart –
remain that Beyonce to Jay Z,
Hillary to Bill,
Aiesha to Muhammad,
Wendy to Nelson,
and Michelle to Barak –
that whole YOU that’ll never tear apart.
All I always wanted and asked God for now is my freedom and that Woman King!!!
SO IS IT YOU?
CHECK YA’SELF’
By Yassin Mohamad
Relax, free your mind and stop worrying about someone else, and evaluate and check ya’self
For real check ya’self, Yeah check ya’self!
Because when you self check ya’self, it’s the best rehabilitation –
and greatest of self wealth.
HOOD INTELLECTUAL
By Yassin Mohamad
I’m what people call HOOD INTELLECTUAL-
because I’m from the hood, intelligent and flexible. When I speak, it’s direct and clear –
I can hold a conversation, religiously, educationally – and break down the atmospheres.
groom my environment and choose my social company- I also dress gutter and casually.
I rarely use profanity, like motherfucker, bitch, or shit-
cause I have an extensive vocabulary that substitutes the nouns a bit. I’m a listener that knows how to separate sense from non-sense –
I deliver my answers with condense.
My mother wasn’t in the game and dad indulged in alcohol and drugs –
of course I know the ingredients in cocaine and who created guns with slugs. Females of all races, religions and ages be feeling me because I overstand – and at any given time I’m able to transform into their dream man.
did high school and a little college-
direct and indirect experiences taught me more and made me polish. Scholars and scientist takes decades and centuries to find out factuals – but I can find it in a day,
because I am a HOOD INTELLECTUAL.
WHEN I SHOW THRU’
By Yassin Mohamad
Y’all acted like I was out when I went down- y’all forgot me cuz I wasn’t no longer around.
When I didn’t have a loop hole, they didn’t check on the kid –
now I’m about to show thru’ everyone wanna write and send pics and bread
You all thought I was dead? Nah, I’m still here –
and when I show thru’ don’t act like I was always in your head. Now everybody wanna come visit me –
this won’t work cause there’s no second chance deceiving me.
OH MY GOD!
By Yassin Mohamad
Oh my God!
The One and only,
Compassionate and Merciful one that’ll never leave me lonely.
Giver of life, death and never sleep,
The First and Last that love when I repent and weep.
Oh my God!
The King and best Provider, Most High and can’t be divided,
and the Al Knower and Seer that no one can hide from.
Oh my God!
The Creator of al that exist,
The Almighty and Judge,
whom punishment and justice won’t miss.
SINGLE WOMAN
By Yassin Mohamad
Excuse me sis I just wanna apologize – on behalf of the men,
that brought them tears to your eyes.
Yes, I know I’m the reason as well for abusing your body and heart,
and putting you through hell.
You’re alone and I’m aware it’s not by choice-
you had a man that didn’t comprehend and didn’t respect your voice.
Longing for companionship, I understand your vibe- but dude didn’t wanna acknowledge your worthiness,
because he was working with pride.
I’m not a fortune teller –
but can I look into your eyes?
Don’t think this a trick to get between your thighs –
where the second treasure lies.
Your expressionless face looks very tiring.
you even turned to the same sex for love, because you got tired of men betrayals and lying.
I know you wish for a respectable deserving man – that’s prepared to be a king to his queen,
and make love to you across the land.
I’m sorry how your let downs came – but stay in a strong heart and mind, and you’ll find someone in your lane.
On your mind, heart, and body he’ll stay focus, and swarm you with kisses and compliments –
and let you know you’re truly heaven sent.
He’ll create a line of love just for your specialty – and at that moment you’ll never be a single woman, because that man will surely be ME (Smile).
THE SPEAKING WIND
By Yassin Mohamad
As I walked out the prison gates at a fast pace – the wind blew smoothly across my face.
It’s been a long time feeling this kind of wind –
because incarceration has its own wind for convicted sins.
A sharp breeze surprisingly sounder in my ear –
“Don’t be afraid, I’m the Wind and I’m excited you returned out here.”
It’s the truth, the wind really spoke – in a calm breezy soft note.
Goose bumps arose and I deeply inhaled- then Wind ask:
“How does it feel to be released from jail?”
I just shrugged my shoulders and for the first time I spoke –
“It feels great, cause being apart from your love ones ain’t no joke.
The wind embraced me like a mother does her newborn and pulled me close-
then cold tears escaped my eyes and snot ran out my nose-
as I ceased walking and damn near froze
There is when I wiped my nose and eyes – Wind stated
” Yassin, I have a surprise. “
Swiftly, I felt myself taken off my feet by the Wind –
“I now want you to meet my fine friends. “
I was taken to Rain and Sun,
and thought about the many dayrooms, block outs, visit postponements –
and solitary confinement for the summer.
Wind said:
“I know you felt Rain disliked you because of all them raining days-
and felt the same about Sun cause you did enjoy al them hot humid days.”
I nodded as I blinked my eyes-
then Rain and Sun sincerely apologized.
Wind called out to Snow, Blizzard and Hurricane as well-
I moved close to Sun, cause I felt acold spell.
They all said they were sorry and left me and Wind alone –
then just like that, Wind blew me home.
I’m so amaze and can’t stop rubbing my head and chin –
by God, I can’t wait to go home to really speak to that wind.
Now I Can Breathe
By Yassin Mohamad
I was enclosed by your suppose to be love –
Like the highest mountain I travelled above
Then suddenly you release your hug
Now I can breathe
I took your discouraging verbal barks –
Like a dog does a cat heart
Knowing our love you were tearing it apart
But now I can breathe
“Boogie you been away a while and things are not the same”
I guess this was your game
As you stain my name
And I’m so glad I can breathe now
Judgmental during our love dealing
Told you our relationship was lolling
So now I’m expressing my feelings
Cause I can breathe now
I Have Got a Son.
Yassin Mohamad.
I am here, Zair.
Because you are in my heart, and I care.
A true father and son we are.
And together, we will gather the stars.
God never made a mistake.
So, my love as your dad is here to take.
You are not alone my son.
And one day, me, you, Noah, Immi, and Auri Rose are going to have a lot of fun.
Never again will I leave.
Because I have learned that a man in a household is what we need.
Everyone will know that you are mine.
And this is why I thank the lord time after time.
Yes! I have a son!
And his name is Zair Smith-Berry.
AKA, Zair Raw.
Distant Lovers
By Yassin Mohamad
Distant lovers we appear to be so far apart.
Are you sure you’re loving me?
Seconds, minutes and hours passed and there’s no sight of you,
then days, weeks, months and years vanish
and your absence is something I’m forced to become accustomed to.
I read, read and re-read all your back mail,
trying to figure was all your writing a draft from a fable tale.
You promised me much and it touched my heart.
Said you love hard, extremely loyal,
a real woman that’s down with her man and does her part.
Said you’ll do anything, all I have to do is ask,
‘cause my love have you twisted – was you talking trash?
Actions accompanied with words make them more authentic,
but you showed that in the first place you didn’t mean it.
I overlooked your flaws out of respect for you,
also for myself, to display my distant love was true.
Grandad
By Yassin Mohamad
Memories that’ll be cherished and never forgotten in my living years
I’ll hold dearly to your precious life although you’re not physically here.
You’re gone in the flesh, but your memories will always remain
‘cause like the stars, you always shine when I say your name.
Your smile will remind me of all the fun times we had
as I stare at all the pictures of you Grandad.
For every song you enjoyed I replay it in my heart
even though your soul is with God, I promise nothing can tear us apart.
Not even death, so make sure there’s room for me left
and boast about how your Grandson repped your name
beyond his last breath.
I love and miss you Grandad.
The Life I Lived
By Yassin Mohamad
They call me a thug
becuz I lived them streets.
They said I’m no good
cuz I hustle to eat.
They called me tha’ lowest of life.
I’m just trying to survive.
They said I’m a piece of shit
becuz for mines I’ll steal, kill and lie.
They said I’m unremorseful with no sign of regret
and I don’t have any picks
claimed I can’t be trusted
becuz I’m always thinking slick.
They called me a drug boss – stick up kid and murderer
who sold drugs to your granny, took money and killed to get by.
They even said I’m breathing dead
with no life in my eyes.
Told everyone I had a lot of females
headed by my sister, holding and moving coke for me
and I would have taken over the Tri-State
if I wasn’t removed off the streets.
They said a lot of things that appear to be true
by what their ears heard and eyes seen.
But you’ll never really know
unless you ask me.
So all the rumours and assumptions don’t even matter
that you all tried to give
becuz in my world if you’re not a solution, you’re a problem
and that’s the life I lived.
Is It a Dream?
By Yassin Mohamad
Am I dreaming?
Should I just state how I feel?
or seek my fortune by spinning the wheel?
My present situation placed a pause on my life concerning so many things,
it feels like my emotions are sparring inside the ring,
waiting for something or someone to swing.
The way you stare at me makes my nerves tingle,
because so bad I wanna kiss you then ask “Are you single?”
Am I dreaming?
Should I just walk away?
And when I look at your juicy lips,
healthy hips, listen to your concern tips,
keep them as memories to replay every day.
Stop walking fast and slowly walk with me
as I boldly palm that nice behind sight,
did I make you laugh? Alright.
Oooooh, let me stop because this may not be a dream,
and I’ll get in trouble for expressing how I feel.
Like, um, I’m anxious to see your early morning face
and I don’t think these compliments are only in this place,
do I still have to chase?
Thanks now allow me to shower these compliments upon you that you deserve,
and they’re truly meaningful because I don’t waste no words.
All I can do for now is fantasize and look,
or share my thoughts with you through my poems and books.
I’m praying my vision of us blossoming will never end
and we grow into deep rooted friends.
Truly, it can be all romantic that it seems,
only if you help me turn this into reality from a dream.
Oh Grandmom!
By Yassin Mohamad
Oh Grandmom, it’s been some time since we’ve talked.
Together we laughed, ate and walked.
You’ve been gone for a while now,
I really miss your smile and church music around.
Things haven’t been the same since you’ve been gone,
friends and some family abandon me and treat me wrong.
If you were still here it wouldn’t be like that,
‘cause you always had my back.
Running in the house, picking you up off your feet I truly miss,
and we ending our conversation over the phone with a kiss-kiss.
Wish you were here to reap what I’ve sown
and to see how much I have grown.
I’ve changed and given up the game of crooks
and now I’m a non-profit organisation organiser
and own a company which manages people and publishes books.
The organisation is called GOALS to help children and adolescents.
It partnered up with MAJOR CHANGE and we received a lot of blessings.
The company is called ALL ‘N ENTERTAINMENT.
It is producing a lot of talent – soon to become famous.
This all started from the books I wrote and you’re in them Grandma,
including Tweet, Lady, Baseemah, Uncle Greg, Gil, Aunt Betty and Grandpa.
I’ve never forgotten anything you showed me or said,
like don’t let nothing hold me back and keep moving ahead.
Inside I always cry when I look at your picture
and pray that Allah will command the grave to be nice to ya.
You’ll always be the number one
and on behalf of your grandchildren,
we love you and this is from your eldest grandson.
Birdy Life
By Yassin Mohamad
Oh! do I wish I was a bird,
because I’ll just fly and on certain people occasionally drop a turd.
Fly with and against the strong winds,
and will never be judged for any sins.
Wake up in the mornings in my comfortable nest,
with a soothed sound of rest.
Go out and catch me some juicy worms
and collect some dried leaves for my next to keep warm.
Never will I go home hungry
and I’ll have a pretty bird named Hope who loves me.
For the winter I’ll grab the family and fly south,
then return home when it gets hot.
I’ll be free!
No wars, no drugs, no phoney hugs.
Only mate, nest, worms and bugs.
With one flap of my wings I’ll be off into the sky.
No prison will be able to cage me until I die.
No backbiting.
No gossiping.
No unnecessary killings!
I won’t have to speak a word.
Boy! do I wish I was a bird.
4 W’s
By Yassin Mohamad
Ask yourself these questions …
Who are you?
What do you want to do with your life?
Where are you trying to go?
When are you going to do it?
… now keep it real with yourself and answer those questions.
Another Wish
By Yassin Mohamad
My heart is pounding as I think about our love,
that’s beautiful like a pond full of doves.
I hurt you by leaving you out there.
This I realized when I arrived here.
Sure wish I could turn back time,
when we first made love and you started crying.
I broke many promises to you for the game.
Now I sit in this lonely cell and my heart will never be the same.
For you to rescue me from this miserable place,
would be a blessing so I can see your face.
If this world was under my control,
I’d ajar these gates to unite our souls.
Apologising for the pain and suffering I caused you
is not enough to make up but it’s real and true.
Your love so pure, sweet and valuable,
my weakness for the fast life made me vulnerable.
All I have now is a thousand pictures and a million stories,
memories of our goods and bads never bores me.
The cruises, out of state trips and designer clothes
and love making keep my heart froze.
I always think of you and weep.
You’ll be a part of me until I’m six feet deep.
Listening to some slow jams made me write this,
thinking of you and another wish.
Miss Too Good
By Yassin Mohamad
Hi Miss Too Good-
may I speak to you if! could?
I’ll let you know what’s on my mind-
and how l sat and contemplated these lines-
after reading that email about Sweet ‘N juicy,
and wanting my name on your behind.
You look delicious to eat-
eyes, lips, breast, coochie and feet-
so you‘re definitely healthy for me.
I‘ll kiss and lick the ground you walk on-
every step l will embark on-
.lanuary 11th. in 76 you was born.
Surely, L‘ll strip you of all your clothes-
and study you gently from head to toes.
Yeah I can get nasty and freakish-
we’re the same zodiac do l know you with this
so are you also ticklish?
I respect that when you at work you’re modest and professional
But after work with me nothing is exceptional
I know you’re enjoying this attention and my compliments –
That’s not comments
You have a phat butt
Your breasts say what’s up?
Plus I love that natural scent
Sexy eyes and I wouldn’t be surprised
That you have MISS TOO GOOD tatted between your thights
Yeah, I’m fantasizing I can’;t lie
I must ask is that tongur piercing only to look fly?
So are you too good for this Sin?
Tell me how can I win?
I can’t wait for this to fully begin –
So until then I’ll keep making you squirm under my pen
Well, thanks for giving me a shot
This definitely means a lot
I know I’m not the only one who that want a spot
But Insha’Allah I’m the only one what wrote you a poem that’s hot!
Happy Birthday Mommy
By Yassin Mohamad
Happy I am to write this poem to you-
Anxious to turn this special day of yours sky blue.
Presumably, this will sincerely touch your heart-
Perfectly as I stack these words that’ll play their part.
Yes! I know if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t be so smart.
Beautiful can be forever-
Internally and externally mommy we’re bonded together.
Richness flows through our sacred blood-
Today is your birthday and you still look young with outstanding love.
How I wish I was home to shout” Happy Birthday Mommy l”
Delightfully dancing and cracking jokes as we party away.
Another year has now gone-
You’re truly a blessing to us all as you continue to stay healthy and strong.
Mommy, I apologize for not being present to give you my kisses and hugs
Opening my arms as I embrace you with your child’s love.
Moving my lips with flooding tears saying” I love you “-
Making you proud to see me alive growing too-
You are a great mommy and this poem is dedicated to you.
Against All Odds
By Yassin Mohamad
How many oppositions must I encounter and overtake
to receive all that been my fate?
My sepulcher has already been situated-
engraved my name waiting for the date.
I’ve been the pluckiest man that I can be-
a testimonial that I’ve always done me.
Revivifying has been a term of my vocab
proficiency, had been hereditary fad.
I‘m a parlous person when I wanna be to the extreme-
overcoming my enemies as I cash in on their pavid state of me.
|’m an elucidator, so nothing I present needs to be re-clarified-
as I travel through life knowing power doesn’t explain itself to rectify
Life
By Yassin Mohamad
Life…
I don’t know where to begin,
but I do understand that someday we’ll end.
Oh Life…
Where? How? or when I must go?
Only God knows.
Hey Life…
We’ve been through rough times together,
Rain, sleet, snow, heat waves and the coldest weathers.
See Life…
I don’t want to depart from family and friends that’s dear,
that sincerely feel me, love, and care,
and will cost them deep wailing sigh and flooding tears,
Damn Life…
I must keep it moving my friend,
but keep in mind the hereafter we’ll meet again.
I Told Y’all Before
By Yassin Mohamad
I told y’all before – I’M NOT FOOL’D!
but you keep trying me dude.
I gave you sincere loyalty and love,
now my soul being pulled away by your slug.
You pulled that damn trigger!
so this is what you call a friend?
HOW YOU FIGURE?
There wasn’t a doubt for you I would sacrifice my life,
here, there are anywhere,
wrong or right!
Our enemies knew this and they peeped a weak spot,
your love and loyalty became suspect-
I THOUGHT WE WERE ALL WE GOT?
I’s over now because we already lost,
the I’s been dotted and the T’s crossed.
I’m glad I was on point from the start,
now it’s a bullet in both of our hearts.
You reached and pulled first and that marked our end,
and we’re not a hood lesson-
Shit like this happens all the time in life and the hood,
friends isn’t sincere and loyalty’s no good.
Just another gem from SIN RAWS,
you better watch out for those you call your dawg.
Love and Loyalty
By Yassin Mohamad
What’s LOVE to most isn’t how I see it –
love isn’t just a word,
your hear and veins must really feel it –
and believe.
What’s LOYALTY to most isn’t how I see it –
loyalty isn’t just a word,
your actions must decree it.
Loving me only when you want to causes conflict –
an emotional roller coaster,
that’s destine to fall into a pit.
Loyalty accompany the trueness of love –
like the stars beautify the dark nights,
and the pond soothes the feathers of doves.
The elements of love is sincerity and caring deep within the heart –
a smile last awhile,
but with you it must start.
As the elements of loyalty is trueness and dedication –
in each other’s presence and absence,
without a date of expiration.
My heart for you is larger than eternity – and if you feel how I feel,
let’s die together upon LOVE AND LOYALTY!
Reflecting
By Yassin Mohamad
My life is a live roller coaster – but I had so it down –
I had to really check myself – when no one was around.
Took a deep breath – feeling spell bound –
it’s time to grow up – right here, right now!
If not, I’ll be laughed at – like a sad crying clow –
and drift off nowhere – without a sound
Let’s Dance
By Yassin Mohamad
Give me your hand,
and let’s do this-
pull us close baby,
and give me a juicy kiss
Gyrate your hips,
sway side to side-
we gonna move together forever,
so just slide.
It’s our own love dance,
that only belong to us-
let me assure you.
love and trust,
as we dance.
Silent Prayer
By Yassin Mohamad
Lord, hear my words-
I believe in only THEE and stand firm.
Forgive my past and future sins-
surely I’ll try to never ever do wrong again.
Thanks for the many chances you gave me-
and thanks for my sincere friends and lovely family.
You turned my heart to what’s right.
I’m now offering prayers from morning to night.
Shaytan sent his soldiers on mission-
to conquer my soul and misdirect my decisions.
But I’m gonna keep fighting my appointed jinn-
and hope you let me in heaven…AMEN
Hidden Wisdom
By Yassin Mohamad
I thought you were forever,
and I was wrong.
I thought you were weak,
but you so strong.
I thought you lied,
however, it was only me wanting to accept the truth.
I thought you abandon your post,
but you only left to strap on your boots.
I thought you really hated me-
it was only my perception.
I thought we were tight-
what a great self-deception,
I thought my wrongs was right.
I felt so confused,
but now with knowledge I understand-
that with this wisdom I can’t lose.
I’m Still Mr. Talkdatshit
By Yassin Mohamad
My name remain the same,
but you forgot what it iz-
I’m the infamous…MR. TALKDATSHIT!
I MAKE IT LAST FOREVER when I give TENDER KISSES-
NIKE had to JET, so I went from SISTER 2 SISTER.
After them I met J on the LO around THE ELEMENTS OF THE STREETZ-
at a DEF JAM party hosted by this SMOOTH GIRL who looked SWEETS.
She was ALL N and felt my VIBE and STUFF with her sexy EBONY face see,
She seen me and turned it up to the MAXIMUM while getting INTERVIEW,
by some BLACK MEN that was STRAIGHT STUNNIN’ and didn’t see me, ya dig M.V.B.?
But then, KIA peeped I was in this HOUSE PARTY-
and started yelling “MR. TALKDATSHIT, HOW DID YOU GET HERE?”
Drunk off CIROC and BACARDI.
I paid her no mind and glanced at the TIME on my ROLEX-
and wasn’t surprised when I overheard SEAN JOHN, G and Q
in line plotting on whose NEXT.
Talkin’ bout they gonna ROC A FELLA who been on some GEO shit-
I don’t want no parts of that, so I started ROLLING STONE,
then gripped something DEELISHIS.
She made all these SEX FACES, liking how I LAY IT DOWN-
then she jumped up, SCREAM and told me she’s DON DIVA,
and worked for the FEDS downtown.
I was SHOCK G. when she yelled COPS! and arrested me for breezin’-
Now I’M LOCKED UP another FOUR SEASONS.
Educate Self
By Yassin Mohamad
Educate self with the right things-
Educate! Educate! is what we all should sing.
Educate myself to reach beyond-
educate yourself and the treasure you’ll find.
Educate myself to be the best-
educate yourself to pass any test.
Educate myself to rise to the top-
educate yourself and believe you won’t stop.
Educate myself, so I study and learn-
educate yourself to recognize the wrong turns.
Educate myself and I’m very proud-
educate with education you should shout out loud.
Educate myself with the dos and don’ts-
educate yourself because will, no one won’t.
I educated myself because it was necessary-
you should also educate yourself to lighten the loads that’s heavy.
Now let’s motivate and educate one another.
I Feel How I Feel
By Yassin Mohamad
I say I love you because I feel how I feel.
When I say fuck you and those with you, it’s because I feel how I feel.
I said I really love and care about your feelings, because I feel how I feel.
I tell everyone, if you’re not with me you’re against me and I feel how I feel.
If anybody don’t like the way I feel, that’s on you because I’ll still feel how I feel.
God’s Test
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
I am still in love –
but is this enough?
I struggle to hold on –
but it’s so tough!
I constantly tell myself
it’s not over –
then out of the blue
I get a good luck clover –
oh bad luck –
move over.
Just a second ago –
I was gonna let go.
But faith showed me –
God has the final say so.
This taught me self love –
is the best –
and struggling was a test
to separate the believer
from the rest.
STAN
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
We’re given people in our lives for a reason –
just like the weather of each season.
I was given a brother-in-law in Stan –
yeah my sister netty Raw old man.
her husband,
my brother –
our Bookie,
her lover.
family is what he was to us
and he always showed he loved much.
he was laid back player made –
now I gotta go to heaven to get that,
fifteen dollars he’d promise me over a decade.
damn Stan, you gone but never forgotten homeboy–
and I always loved you for bringing my sister joy.
you got to meet Lucy the love of my life –
and when you see her mom Ms. Helen,
tell her now her daughter’s my wife.
this not the end only the beginning –
I’m gonna play your lottery number,
to get your winnings.
stay cool until next time –
and know the Berry’s gonna always keep you in mind.
Solitude Tears
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Tears of solitude invisibly spill –
non stop drying the skin,
hardening the face at will.
Be strong, keep your head up straight face –
because I hear the scratching sounds of crickets,
this isn’t my rightful place.
long forgotten in no man’s land
a living hell clinched tight in society
we don’t love this man or woman.
my thanks have been stolen,
there’s none for the living –
it’s the last time I’m giving.
shattered dreams revisited.
emotions embraced with closed fist –
beating tunes of solitude’s dish –
forgotten heart breaks
because of a locked gate,
isn’t that some shit!
NETTY’S BIRTH RIGHT
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
This time keeps playing –
as God show’s in your grown,
there’s no delaying.
Another year has come and past –
it’s true that angels of God will outlast.
The things you’ve done in life –
being a great sister, aunt and wife.
I know grandmom in heaven celebrating –
remembering how mommy knew you was a plan she created.
So wonderful and special you are –
your love is surely the greatest under these stars.
Netty you are the best sister Allah could give –
and for you to be immortal I’ll die for you to live.
Happy Birth Right, yes you’re 43 years old –
and I pray you’ll have a thousand more to add
to the family’s history that will be told.
I love you sis and Happy Birth Right Netty Raw!!
REALIZED
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
I realized the light was out when all got dark –
I realized her soul was gone when I didn’t hear the beat of her heart.
I realized there wasn’t any water when I swallowed sand –
I realized I couldn’t reach you with what you don’t understand.
I realized that hate was easy to love –
I realized that your enemy will give you a friendly hug.
I realized success comes when I strive-
I realized even the truthful ones tell lies.
I realized it’s not the fall but the way you return back –
I realized a big leak can come from a small crack.
I realized everyone always blames God when things go wrong-
I realized that it starts within to grow strong.
I realized being a parent is a great blessing-
I realized also to take advantage of life’s lessons.
I realized that a fool don’t earn from his mistakes –
I realized this when playing myself in chess and got fool’s mated.
LOVE IN BLOSSOM
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Our time together seem brief,
And our words yet so few
But still I knew there was something about you.
Rather it was your style or sweetness,
I’ve not yet to know
But if time permits and it’s in the stars above.
Let there be for you and I
A beautiful ribbon in the sky.
This here I dream,
But can dreams become reality?
Or do all hearts strive to find and bind with another in harmony
While two hearts beats as one melody?
Is two truly a magic number?
I’ve not yet to know
But shall continue to search to find that glow.
Until then, I will dream of a full heart with life, love and laughter
For togetherness, YES! Is all that I am after.
CLOSE TO THEE
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Understand my feelins as I approach
This paper with my thoughts and without a coach.
It’s been a long time since I’ve been touched
By someone I dream about and miss so much.
The strangeness that’s creepin within
Isn’t nuttin but a revisit to my beginnin’.
Emotions I had to abandon just to survive
Has returned from the first sight of your eyes.
I didn’t fully appreciate your beautiful and presence in the past
Now I’m sure this time Imma make it last.
Showing my happiness in so many ways
I’m unable to speak although I have a lot to say.
Wishing to embrace you with my strong and powerful arms
And protect you from any harm.
This is real and I believe
That you won’t know how much you miss someone,
Until they’re gone, so please don’t leave.
Let me enjoy your delightful presence
Sit down and read this poem over cause you’re my blessing.
You gave me back a normal life as a man
I’ve been beaten and degraded up in the mountains.
How you found me with the many scars and empty heart grazed
Mindful of rage that at times left you dazed
Was the abreaction from the enemies adopted ways.
My smile, my glow, my positive thinking, again I’m happily me
You freed me from the mad house
And I’m so grateful and close to thee.
WHEN ALL IS OVER WITH?
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
When will this all be over with?
Stuck inside a human can
Caught up in the web
A cesspool, you understand?
WHEN WILL THIS ALL BE OVER WITH?
Gotta stand up lights on for count
Strip ass naked degraded,
2 letters,
4 numbers,
Become your life’s amount.
WHEN WILL THIS ALL BE OVER WITH?
Visits from family mostly mom and dad
Children constantly asking when you coming home dad?
You’re not for sure and this is sad.
WHEN WILL THIS ALL BE OVER WITH?
Stressing about appeals, phone calls and mail
Guard falsify misconduct and hearing examiner,
Give you 270 days in the hole,
Eating out a dirty tray in a funky cell.
WHEN WILL THIS ALL BE OVER WITH?
A bias jury and a racist judge
District attorney is related to your lawyer,
Verdict GUILTY!
And prison guards got a grudge!?!
WHEN WILL THIS ALL BE OVER WITH?
Betrayed by the woman you called your wife
She had a baby the homie you took the case for,
You fed up and take your life…
NOW IT’S ALL OVER WITH!
I’M THANKFUL
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
I’m coming again Lord,
To thank you for reopening the spiritual door.
The door of eternal success to reach my goals,
Disciplining and purifying thy soul.
Thy soul is no happy and at peace,
I shunned the devil’s deception and my inner beast.
Inner beast that savagely ate away at me,
Devouring relationships, friends and family.
Family is tight now as you command,
And I’m once again a loved true man.
True man I wasn’t as I took the streets as my God,
And worshipped materialistic things and evil lies.
Evil lies that led my life down the path of negativity,
Until I sincerely repent to you and change positively.
Changed positively had to come in to my life,
I was tired of living a terrible life.
Terrible life is what helped me run your way,
And now I firmly pray and worship you every day.
Thank you, one and only GOD.
A FRIEND
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Most times we don’t recognize or appreciate a sincere friend
Until the final end
When there’s no longer a friend.
A friend gonna ride through thick or thin
That’s a person there whether you lose or win
Whose gonna raise your head when your chest touching you chin.
A friend will do any and everything to protect you from harm
That person gonna keep it real with you right or wrong.
A friend whose love and loyalty is sincere
And whose gonna always show you they care.
A friend I was whenever you needed me
I was always encouraging you when no on believe in thee.
When things got hectic your so called friends showed you their backs
But I was there preparing to move with no rap.
Of course, the haters attempt to divide my loyalty
And I immediately let it be known no matter what YOU’RE MY HOMIE!
Through all the rift raft I stood as a friend all the time
In your presence and absence a friend will be your second heart and mind.
I rode hard for you through blizzards and hurricanes
Committing crimes and alone with your chick,
A friend I did remain.
A friend I truly am and will be until my life is due
Now keep it real with yourself first,
Is a true friend in you?
I’M FEELING LIKE
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
I’m feeling like taking on all
I’m feeling like only care about the Raws.
I’m feeling like this life is done
I’m feeling like ending this all with a razor, drugs or a gun.
I’m feeling like the world is just taking advantage of me
I’m feeling like everyone is phonies around me.
I’m feeling like life’s not even real
Seeming like I’m ready to snap at will.
I know my free will is to do what I want
To say and act like I feel and don’t front.
I’m feeling like myself today then not tomorrow
I’m feeling like what happen in with COVID-19 added to my sorrow.
I’m feeling like the visit I just had was a set up
I’m feeling like everything the world do is a write up.
I’m feeling like my feelings becomes weak then strong
So I ask you all, is my feelings wrong?
PEACHES AND CREAM
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Everything isn’t peaches and cream
Meaning, everything isn’t what it seems.
Like, what looks like diamonds and gold
Could be a disguise to present the best story ever told.
What look good outside isn’t within
Now you’re a victim of a silent sin.
Don’t believe me oh yeah!
Think back when betrayal and dishonesty whispered “I LOVE YOU” in your ear.
Or “I’m your homie for life”
Now your homie is a husband to your wife.
That nice car shining on 22 inch gold rims
You bought it with your last dividens
To find out the motor is condemn
Ole girl is really a him
That chubby social net dude wasn’t really muscles or slim!
You wake up from neither a nightmare or dream
Now you realize everything isn’t all peaches and cream.
LONELY CELL
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
I sit in this lonely cell, just staring at the wall
Wondering how I let myself fall.
I thought hard to come to conclusion
Fogged mind nothing but illusions.
Toss and turn with many what ifs and has beens
And I then awake in a puddle of sins.
Born guilty so I’m falsely accused
Of being hyperactive with a short fuse.
Let out cries that I only can hear
Dying in prison besides ALLAH is what I really fear.
Try my best not to lose my sanity
Or start despising the entire humanity.
A lost soul that’s outta control
I must maintain and never fold.
My story is written and talked about
Look in to my eyes and you’ll really scream and shout.
Wondering how I made it thus far
So I die with the words ALLAHU AKABAR!
YOU STARTED THIS
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
I know that you have to front right now
Act like you’re not feeling me right now
Is you being real to yourself?
As you constantly worry about my health and not my wealth.
Will you fault me for going for something I’ve been deprived of for years?
Something that makes me drown in tears
Because until you came it wasn’t there.
Many attempted and this I know
So you heard all the game that the tongue flowed.
But how about hearing and feeling something real?
Hearing the truth from a real heart of how I feel?
I’ve never been a yes man and I’m not hyping up your ego
You’re sexy in many ways and no your uniform is not see through.
Your body is how I like it
But it’s your character and mind that I love and like.
Can I praise your smile and pretty eyes that you keep steady on me?
Because they silently say you wish I hurry and get free.
Well it seems like that’s what they’re saying
And when you walk away and twerk I be ready to shout “PLEASE STOP TEASING ME!”
Or am I teasing? You may ask
I swear I’m not and my smile on my face isn’t a mask.
Physically I’m in here behind bars
Mentally, spiritually and emotionally I’m chilling with you behind the stars.
Where no one but us can understand our silent conversation
Without touching each other we still feel that sexy vibration.
You did this! Yeah I’m placing this crush thing on you
But I promise my part will be definitely true
Now we both can take the blame Pooh!
WHERE DO WE STAND?
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
You must understand I’m a man if dignity
A man that demands and earned a respect is who I be.
Disrespect and dishonor is the elements to start a war
I’m a man that faces these elements to even the score.
If I ask you to look in to my eyes and tell me how you feel
Would you drift through my world and keep it real?
Face the reality of possibility of never feeling the intimate touch from the opposite sex
And only teased with false words coming from the neck.
You get angry and cringe when I talk
Never once did you analyze why my words be so dark.
You don’t show no understanding or emotional sympathy
But you go the audacity to suck your teeth and roll your eyes at me.
I know the truth and acknowledge it is what it is
You act upset because I won’t submit as a project or human quiz.
Am I feeling some kind of way?
No doubt everyday being in this mad house away from my family.
You claim to feel my pain that I don’t hide
I wonder is this a tactic you’ve learned to sneak inside?
Your hurt can be healed by only approaching me
Unlike you, I don’t need a training sergeant to coach me.
My feelings is real here
My mind is authentic like the air
My world makes my words sincere
Now ask yourself, do you really care?
Consult with your heart as it beats
I just understand and accept I must remain me.
My intentions has never been to hurt your heart
I certainly value and respect you playing your part.
I approach this poem with a plan
So tell me
Where do we stand?
DO U FEEL ME POOH?
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
When I first saw you,
Angels glorified and I felt so good inside.
Your heart attracted mine girl,
I knew you were the only one for my world.
Pooh, do you realize you soften this crook?
Got me writing love letters, poems and books.
You got me caught up so I’m always calling your phone,
When you ain’t home I get sick cause my love can’t leave you alone.
I know you work and get off around seven or eight,
I can’t call you late, keep in mind your man up state.
I wanna take you upon the stars where you belong,
Keep cool, stay strong cause it won’t be long.
We gonna build this foundation on love and trust,
Stay communicating and know strength is a must.
Cause them streets will have you change ya mind that ya’ mine,
You slip up and cross the line.
I’mma play my part behind these bars,
Keep sucker free, let females be and push weight on them bars.
You’re the queen of my heart so reflect upon me and stay true
So tell me – do you feel me Pooh?
I WONDER
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Yes, I wonder what’s ahead of me,
A destiny that seems endless to be.
Chosen choices,
Inner voices,
Many decisions that was force.
Seeing dim light,
That’s so far outta sight.
But I’ll continue to reach with all my might.
I WONDER WHAT’S NEXT?
My curiosity refuse to rest,
So I wrestle the flesh out of my chest.
Take a look at my heart,
That been broken and torn apart,
It wasn’t like this from the very start.
Every step I make,
Is another breath I take,
And with every breath I intake,
My life being at stake.
No question I wonder what’s next in life,
Would I regain my freedom and live right?
Embrace my children and kiss my wife.
Hug my mother, father, sisters and brothers,
Spend time with my uncles, aunts and cousins,
And visit the graves of my grandparents.
Be an abiding citizen,
Once again feel the wind,
Since I’ve repented for my sins.
Oh do I wonder how I’ll be treated,
Upon my release try to get a job and told to beat it,
Then the love of my life leave me
Because I won’t get between her legs and eat it.
Time changes,
Places arranges,
Faces look strange.
And I’m still wondering long range.
Now I sit here wondering about here-there-everywhere,
Am I ever gonna get near?
I swear I wonder.
SKIN DEEP
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Visually I see colored skin
And don’t at times sees within.
Skin colors, black, red, white
The natural things that people use to fight.
But what’s color of the heart?
And brain and soul that’s torn apart.
Wars has been started because the color of our skin
So when will anyone lose or win?
Angry because of each other melanin
Hating between BAHAJAH’s and HELENS’.
Racist against the creators of humankind
Even racist towards the IQ of the mind.
Categorized by the color of our skin
But neither black not white is within.
Trying to change nature’s order
So for our color we get disrespected, ostracized and slaughtered.
Why not judge by the good and bad someone does?
And no by ones religion, history and skin color that’s us!
Where you was born and not where you come from
In all actuality hating skin color is so dumb
This is a worldly topic that causes many deaths alone
But after we die our skin color will turn to the color of bones.
THE FINAL TESTAMENT
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
No one knew I would leave so soon
But I will remain strong and brighten up the room.
God wanted me to return to him
Because I almost drowned in an ocean of sin.
The calmness and tranquility in heaven is so adorable at ease
It feels great to no longer want, be sick, stressed, sleep, cough or sneeze.
Honestly, I thought I was gonna be in hell
Come to find out my last prayer protected me from the doomed dwell.
I’ll definitely miss y’all that I loved so dearly
And I’ll be at heaven’s gate when you get here.
Don’t allow them tears to stain y’all cheeks
I’m forever happy now without enemies and beef.
Please keep living life how you all been
And look out for my grandbabies and protect them from the streets of sin.
Ummi and Abi, don’t cry forever because this was preordained
And thanks for being wonderful parents and giving me a honorable name.
Homies and friends, you know who you are
Remember my song IF I SHOULD DIE?
Forget me not, cause I’m peeping from the stars.
I’ll miss us taking trips, getting blunted, money and shilling on the blocks
Tell all my chicks I’ll always be with them cause my love don’t stop
Know that I’m comfortable, relieved and okay
I’m in paradise and there’s no killing, backbiting, stealing or dismay.
Well, I’m out and to all my foes and fake enemies
FUCK Y’ALL
I’m in heaving still getting money.
DEAR READERS
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Thank you dear readers once again
For reading and supporting the poetic life of little Yassin.
Every poem meant so much to me
Challenging stages of my Journey.
Traveling through the ups and downs
That’ll bring tears to even a clown.
Rhythms and melodies all in my head
So know it’s all truthful words that you read.
Sweet music for you to enjoy and understand
Now you can say you know SIN RAWS the matured man.
Trials of errors brought he best of me
So my good outweighed my bad, but all goes down into history.
My eyes are the windows to my soul
Some of y’all had to dress warm cause it got cold.
From the first poem to this last one
Was enjoyable to share with you and have fun.
I had to abreact to get things off my chest
Finally I’m relieved, now I can rest.
Resentment, hatred and anger can destroy quick most of the time
Expressions and communication can help the mind.
I pray y’all learnt something better YOU
And teach others positive things to do.
Some call smith because how I play with words
I just do what I do to make sure my story is heard.
FRIEND OR FOE
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Who are you?
Friend or foe?
First you love me
Then hate me;
It’s obvious I’m not in your heart no more,
Or was I ever in there?
You said I was a real dude that you’ll die for,
Here – there or anywhere,
Even if I was wrong –
You’ll go against the world and even murder the atmosphere,
So no one but the team –
Our family –
Can breathe the air!
Now you betrayed me –
Dishonored – lied – disunited us,
Broke my heart you crossed,
Left me hanging to die like Jesus on the cross..
You Judah!
SILENT EXPRESSIONS
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
My fingers are sore but this writing stuff I can’t stop –
Head pounding, hectic headaches ‘cos I’m thinking a lot.
So much on my mind that needs to be let out-
Anxiously I grab a pen and go on route.
Thoughts rushing out fast as speeding light –
As I capture them while I begin to write.
With my ability to arrange sentences and paragraphs –
Give people my vision to see my positive and troublesome paths.
Nouns and adjectives start spilling –
Verbs, pronouns and adverbs show my natural feelings.
DAMN! I’ve picked up my poetic pen again –
To continue this urbpoetry trend.
Some thought volume one was it –
Me too, but I couldn’t quit.
Changes occurred including challenging situations –
My height of thinking and direction of destinations.
My vocals no more at a standstill-
I’m fed up with all this bullshit and I’m no longer afraid to express how I feel.
I love you, hate you, don’t like you….like you –
Know what? Fuck you!
I’m abreacting now and all I say is true.
So I’m now gonna share things with you –
Again in SILENT EXPRESSIONS, VOLUME TWO.
VENOM
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Call it what you want.
Life is reality and no stunt.
People see things through their own eyes even if they’re blind.
What I eat won’t make you shit so don’t be surprised
If you’re not of me or for me as I say this from the heart – FUCK YOU!!!
DOUBLE BUBBLES
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Denied of a choice to have the both of you –
Leaves me stunned without a clue –
I want my cake and ice cream too –
Because in my sleep the both of y’all is my dream duo
Being straight forward have y’all stun –
Because I want two and not one.
What you don’t have she possesses –
And having you both will be a blessing.
Y’all is driving me insane –
Can y’all picture you both with my last name?
So much in common, not far apart –
What’s very in common is y’all together captured my heart.
Smooth beautiful skin –
She’s taller but from behind
You definitely the eldest twin.
I can’t decide because you both is all that I want and need.
I’m fantasizing about y’all nude on each side of me.
I’ll be kissing your lips while releasing her bra strap-
Playing with her tongue ring while rubbing your lower back.
Yeah, I wanna occupy both of y’all world –
So get a tattoo between your breast “I’M ONLY SIN’S GIRL”
Please understand I can’t decide –
I seriously want you two on my side –
I wanna be with y’all until I die –
This the truth that my heart can’t deny.
Chocolate and caramel is my favourite sweets –
And y’all fit this description that’s very deep.
So grab her hand and y’all then grab onto mine –
And let’s stay happily together beyond the end of time.
I SURVIVED TO LIVE
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Do you really wanna know how I’m living in the penitentiary?
That’s not far from a huge cemetery.
Being watched over by other souls that’s lost –
So my only option is WAR against the workers of the boss.
A single cell angry black man –
That mentally formed like this after years in the can.
The C.Os jiggling keys became my alarm –
And their batons is only for harm.
I smell dry blood on their black boots –
And if you had an orange jumpsuit they’ll have your blood too!
Sadistically and maliciously deny me exercise, food and shower –
Just to prove to me and other prisoners that they have the power.
It hurts, I can’t fake it and I don’t wish this on anyone –
Except for the C.O.s that enjoy seeing my dick, balls and asshole, like it’s fun.
In their psychological death chambers, I’ve been degraded many times –
Believe when I say it’s hard to think positive in a homicidal mind.
All the rehabilitation has been thrown out the window –
As D.O.C. created the RESTRICTED RELEASE LIST for me to die in the hole –
Or go crazy before I go home.
But Level five has no parole!
Want me to take psychotropic meds to calm down –
But it’s really to receive federal grants for turning me into a D-code clown.
You’re wondering why I’m so angry in my writing?
Take my place fighting thirteen men in full riot gear –
Get tasered, beat with batons, sprayed, strip ass naked,
And tied down in a restraint chair.
Now tell me how you like it?
HELL NO! I didn’t bring this shit on myself-
I use to be athletically healthy,
Now I got questionable health.
I have more than blood in my eyes’
And if this my ending, alone I won’t die!
I met brothers and sisters with no soul in their eyes and it was a shame
And if I never experience this, I would of thought they were playing games.
Only the strong survive, but for how long?
I tried to follow the rules and cage my tongue.
How can I overlook a C.O. taking another prisoner’s food?
All because his miserable power hungry ass in a bad mood!
So I had to teach to unify –
Because a whole is better than one and it’ll make it hard for us to die.
I refuse to change into what they want –
I was standing up in society, so why in prison should I front?
Just like the University of Penn experiments in HOLMESBURG days –
These people wanna implant their diabolical ways.
Why don’t they try it on their kids and lock them indefinitely in a room –
Starve and beat them like animals with mops and brooms?
And if they die, fake it like it was a suicide they committed –
Then flash your prison guard ID and watch them forget it.
I abased this poem off my experiences and feelings –
Administration’s psychological torture & C.O.’s conspired killings.
So what you’re reading here is real –
God bless the dead and keep the living with a strong will –
Never would our internal and external scars heal-
And if I die now, know the C.O.’s read this before my next meal.
I. L.O.V.E.Y.O.U.B.A.B.E
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Intelligently I had to..
Let you know how I feel about..
Our love that I feel…
Victorious about because we accomplish and promise to spend..
Eternity together and forever.
You and I really are..
One together and that’s a complete cipher, a huge..
Universe that’s built around us – WE’RE ONE!
Beauty is in all you do, not just your looks, you have..
Accomplished a lot during our tested and successful relationship..
Because of love, dedication and sincerity we built this..
Enormous love shield around us that’s unable to be penetrated.
I LOVE YOU BABE.
RAAJAA MOHAMAD
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Remembering the closeness and love of us-
And knowing our blood is rich with loyalty and trust-
Just how our parent’s parent showed them it’s a must-
Acknowledging we shall stay lovers beyond our physical body’s dust-
As Allah has blessed us like the sweet scent of Egyptian must.
Muslimah you are a great wife to me-
Obedient to Allah and prophet Muhammad as you should be-
Honoring you I will forever do lovey-
Anxious I am to melt inside my beautiful wifey.
May I continue to make you happy and proud cause that’s what it’s about-
Allahu Akbar for you I scream and shout-
Divine is Allah, so don’t count your husband Ibn Yassin out!
THE SPECIAL IN YOU
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
The special in you is so transparent –
This makes you such a valuable and lovably parent.
I smile when I see your face and hear your voice –
Choosing another women to be you I will forfeit my choice.
There’s no other that can take your place –
A special woman like the most expensive wine taste –
The special in you makes you who you are –
Like Allah used the vast sky to house the wonderful and attractive stars.
The men of this world that won your heart –
Had to see that you were the whole future and not just a part.
How can you be described without mentioning beautiful, special and great –
It will be like mentioning a day, month and year without a date.
Your love and support make me strong when you’re around –
And your presence turns my frown upside down.
Prison may hold me physical –
But you free me mentally and emotional.
Mommy we love you –
Adore you –
And admire you –
Because of THE SPECIAL IN YOU –
This is definitely you!
REALLY
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
One day sun light searched for his smile and knew it wasn’t there,
Energy was checking his temperature to see if he still cared,
Or did the last phase ruin him.
He was always on the move,
Always on the go.
Playing “watch me enjoy it you’ll never know,”
Like you won’t about the end.
A fine woman observing revealing her love for unpredictability,
And said, “it has a romantic twist that maintains what’s sexy.”
As if she just threw four playing cards on the table and told him to pick,
Then he told her “If I put the card in my hand, you can’t put nothing good in it.
She’d signed on the “I’m yours line,”
And afterwards said “My mind is open to you anytime,
No doubt the SIN was having his way but couldn’t get caught up in his prime.
So, he decided to keep it moving,
And left her curious and grooving.
He soon realized the vicious hours of the nights would pay dividends,
With crimes everywhere and hatred circling with money resembling best friends.
Which one is higher?
The wrong choice could take away quality desires.
Drama increased and for a moment of peace,
He reunited with the woman wishing to release.
Remembering the cards, he secretly flipped one which read “the spotlight fall is hard,”
Clearly wrongdoing was coming after his world.
The next survival card read “60percent walk away without a hunt,
The other 20percent flee –
The last twenty told him to confront.
He did neither, instead he didn’t care so the money got funny.
Cause many wanna be’s laughed, the Judge heard it applying enough months.
Now he stands between the get back or the comeback,
But did he really feel like that?
Right away he started growing in another direction,
As he builds on dedication.
True net worth will come that was neglected then,
It’s the value knowing that sometimes when we lose we really win.
MZTHOLOGICAL FACE
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Days of a bachelor still remain strong amongst ever changing meaning,
many are out there attempting to manipulate a gentleman’s greetings.
However, he continues to sincerely say ‘Hello’.
So smooth as the fine sounds of a cello.
Her brighten smile acknowledges assertive finest,
Then through the beauty of her eyes she said “You’re one of Gods’ greatest.”
Wondering how he could be someone of such caliber,
He looks nice, but not draped in glamour.
Love, how well do we really understand vision from the lenses of our retina?
Focusing the light into a shape that helps the brain to produce its data.
What he seen in her was a shining, international chic atmospheric spirit.
A woman that has #enough love to bee able to share it.
Instinctively, he thought she was on of the elite female lover of all times,
They’re the only ones that shows that beauty isn’t just looking physically fine.
But because he couldn’t see it, the mystery sent him into a deep emotional darkness,
It was now up to him to accept the authentic superstar she really is.
Her elegant beauty mixed with a gorgeous landscape,
Creates a beautiful heart that’ll be difficult to escape.
Figuring out these emotions maybe hard to untangle,
Was he facing pure hatred or was God introducing him to a rare human archangel?
He’s confused and so upset that his perspectives are so blurry,
So, should the decision making be made in a hurry?
He feels like a person with 20/20 vision but unable to see,
Alas! All of a sudden, his vision returned, and he now sees things in 3-D.
This made him melt like a fallen head in a flexible mirror,
Due to fear of hot being able to face her through the clouded glamour.
From that moment has overstanded the power of the great cello is solace,
A quality that only speaks through the calmness of her MYTHOLOGICAL FACE!
THE PORTAL
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
People Observations requires a true assessment of their lives –
To make a better way to build their emotions and spirit high.
Obduracy needs to be replaced with a sense of the garden of Eden –
To be able to advance through the next phase of meaning.
Revelations it is whether it’s through God’s Holy Torah Bible or Qur’an-
It’ll be u p to you to change the negativity in the heart and mind.
Taction of caring is what we need –
Removing tactless that originated from tact so we can succeed.
Abnegation must be obfuscated by a positive inspiration –
But it all depends on us to go get it with sincere determination.
Love, sincerity and respect for yourself and others –
Will help us through the greatest portal of life like no other.
Words of advice from a man that went from a man that went from worse to better, it can be done if you want to do it. But you just “QUIT TRYING AND JUST DO IT BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU CAN, ONLY IF YOU WANT TO!”
I VERSE Me
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Travel with ME and watch the words I manifest –
As I try my very best –
To continue this positive progress –
With no thoughts of regress.
Of course, Satan seeks my downfall and always counting me out –
Seeking to see what I am truly about.
This feels like one of my past boxing bouts –
Dodging punches on the way to a championship rout.
I have to keep reminding myself ‘don’t use anger’ –
Because anger can easily adopt the letter ‘D’ and turn into danger –
And danger could lead to trouble and things much stranger.
So I focus on self-control –
Conditioning myself physically, mentally and purifying my soul –
And allow people to see I am not that monster of old –
I just never allowed my side of the story to be told.
I embraced the responsibility of ME –
Only allowing the trusted sincere ones near ME –
As I verse and race ME to my awaited destiny.
Oh do I want to rid the hatred I harbor within –
That ME use to justify during horrible sins –
That I must now relieve o allow my new life to begin.
This I accept along with my mistakes and problems –
Seeking to correct the mistakes and for the problems I will solve them,
Damn I be feeling like I am living in Gotham.
YES ! I BEAT ME
When?
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
When is the new trend going to begin?
When is the chaos going to end?
When is the smile going to come from a sincere friend?
When is the lion going to be freed from the den?
When?
When is the cop killing going to stop?
When is males going to start being fathers instead of pop?
When is females going to take back their spots?
When is the youth going to cease wanting to feel a gun shot?
When?
When is Black loves and all loves going to matter?
When is you going to climb the ladder?
When is the government going to stop stealing history’s data?
When is you going to pursue your dreams instead of seeing them shattered?
When?
When is we going to help our sisters and brothers?
When is we going to start giving more love to our fathers and mothers?
When is we going to educate each other?
When is we going to love and respect one another?
When?
When is that major change going to happen?
When is the M.C. going to rid the rappin’?
When is you going to control yourself and cease snapping?
When is you going to accept yourself as an African, European and Latin?
When? When? When?
When is you going to stop asking the when question?
When is we going to move on to a new lesson?
When is you going to recognize that major change is that blessing?
When?
My Sacrifice
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
Wake up!
And feel and overstand my wits –
What’s the real reason for politics?
When politics advise cops to use extended clips –
To tear Black families’ lives to bits –
That’s why no I’m hype as the odor of shit!
Not being held responsible for criminal acts they do –
Taking initiations like a gang-mafia or terrorist crew –
So what should I .M. BrownTrayvon Martins do?
Call your own 9-1-1 number on you?
Only for them to come and help you kill us too?
Uses me alike as an example to build more prisons –
After finding the streets with drugs, guns and stool pigeons –
I’m extremely upset while writing this –
None of the police victims got to fulfill their young dream list –
And the world acting like they don’t know why blacks is piss!
Killed the youth – you killed me –
Imprisoned the elders – you take our history –
Deny the people equality – you begging for a civil war –
Is there a political reference keeping the score?
I’m in prison and it’s said my life doesn’t matter like my Black people –
That I have no rights and no way to be equal –
Guards denigrate me and cops killing became legal –
This is becoming a sequel –
That the characters can’t rest in peace.
So now I’m ready to sacrifice all I am and not –
Telling loved ones I’ll miss them a lot –
But I have to stop this kill the people plot –
By standing up and dying from a political gun shot.
A Glimpse Of Hope
By Yassin Mohamad
I was taught to never give up and stay on guard-
I’ve never lost a fight so I’m taking this one so hard.
I asked ALLAH what am I doing wrong-
And then I hear a whisper “Don’t give up stay strong.”
My heart light up because it sounds like the voice of my grandmom-
So I focus to keep Hope again a time
I know I’m doing the best that I can-
Oh grandmom Silvia you know how I am.
I wish I can see your face once again-
Oh how I feel your wonderful presence like the wind.
I know you heard your grandbabies to that big step-
Becoming married by the blessings of Allah that day was the first time I really wept.
I hope you was proud-
No grandmom it’s not incest, ask Allah it’s Halal.
But now it feels like things is falling apart-
And I’m hurting because Rajaa is my heart.
I tried and tried, however, I’m in jail and she’s on the streets-
Her love for drugs and sex with it I can’t compete.
I love her so much it brings me pain-
I accepted her proposal to get married because I love her and thought she’ll change.
I’m trying to get us through this though-
Although I feel she wants us to let go.
I just want her to be happy and live a great life-
Even if this means I have to let her go as my wife.
We had out battles with dissatisfied family members but we stood against whoever-
She even shared with me her promise to keep the family together.
I know you, grandpa Herbert, Ernie, with Nassirah anxious to see how we handle this-
Please keep us in y’all prayers and I hope ALLAH grant my special wish
Oh My
By Yassin Mohamad
Oh my! The height of your love makes me high
Giving the best climax of love beyond the sky
Oh my! Yes I thank Allah a million times
Because of the gift of his he gave to be mine
Oh my! Rajaa you are a great muslimah, friend and wife
Very worthy you are so to you I dedicate my life.
Oh my! Is more than an expression to me
Is a recitation that I think of you for eternity
Oh my! Is this the dream you said you dreamt of?
Me being your husband you prayed for to God above.
Oh my! Am I who you really wanted?
Since we was kids you felt on you I was front’,
Oh, my! I’m so honored Allah answered you prayers and chosen me
To be your final life partner beyond eternity.
Oh my! This also my dream come true
So never doubt when I say I deeply love you!
FROM LIFE TO EVER LASTING LIFE
BY YASSIN MOHAMAD IBN YASIN & RAJAA MUHAMAD RAFI ABDULLAH
Today I just received some bad news-
That caught me off guard after pouring out tears of blues.
My uncle/father in law just died-
I stubbornly shook my head as if the Imam would conquer up this lie.
I felt he was telling me the truth-
I just didn’t wanna believe it deep rooted.
Death been in my ears for a couple of days now-
Because my wife just told me our niece just been gunned down.
I know this the decree of God-
So please don’t judge me as I cry.
This my blood, my history returning to the earth-
And I understand all I will follow that’s birth.
But do we want to? That’s the question to ask-
As we perform a janaza or close the cask.
Uncle Rafi and Shanalla, we all will soon be there-
And know for you both, we always loved and care.
At least now there will only be good-
Nothing but righteousness in paradise hoods.
May God give y’all the best in the hereafter-
And as y’all continue into the next chapter-
And we will keep asking for forgiveness from Allah-
And pray he’ll reunite us under his heavenly stars.
Whose Side You On?
By Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
This isn’t your average poetry or speech.
It’s about accountability or responsibility
& Try your heart I hope to reach.
So I ask you. Who’s side you on?
Don’t look over your shoulders or around
I’m speaking to you! Him! Her! & you all!
Our flesh and friends in their graves
& You write Rest In Peace on the walls!!
You pollute the neighborhoods & say it’s a part of the game
& laugh how our children got locked up & die
Said you love your folk, what a joke
Cause they hungry & you feed them dreams and lies
So whose side you on, can you tell me that?
That’s a question I been waiting to ask
Don’t you think its time for a major change?
So you can take off that mask?
Yeah, I’m talking to y’all, him, her, & you!
No need to roll your eyes and suck your teeth.
Tell us whose side you on!
So we’ll know what next to do.
That’s the problem, can’t make up the mind,
So you quick to protest,
Flood the streets, put words to beats,
After a cop shoot a brother in the chest,
So whose side you on?
I’m not saying turn your anger and guns on another race of people
Yeah, it’s a fact that I’m black,
But we all should be treated equal.
We tired of you playing both sides of the fence,
Our people dying, the government lying.
& It’s not a guilty verdict with video footage evidence
So whose side you on?
Brother that’s not a bitch, that’s your Mom, daughter, sister, or woman
Sister that’s not your nigga, that’s your Dad, son, brother, or man
The youth need to be taught self respect,
& The community needs to give a helping hand,
Whose side you on?
I want you all to ponder & look into yourself,
Let’s stop betraying each other to make a major change,
& I’m not talking about currency wealth
Now who’s side you on?
Let’s Be Truthful
By: Yassin Sin Raws Mohamad
We been bullshitting with the truth long enough…
So lets be truthful.
Is scared the same as afraid?
How about is brave courage?
Lets be truthful.
Is rich the same as wealthy?
How about fine and healthy?
Lets be truthful.
What would happen if black lives mattered rushed the Capitol?
How about if Houdini became Nat Turner through magical?
Lets be truthful.
Is black the same as white?
How about is a funeral the same as unite?
Lets be truthful.
Is changing physical the same as changing mentally?
How about is changing mentally is chancing physically?
Lets be truthful.
Who are you?
What do you really want to be?
Are wanting to be who you want is fair to yourself and people?
Lets be truthful.
We talk this positive shit when we have a misfortune happen to us,
How about those that spoke for us before we even exist?
Are we representing them now?
Lets be truthful.
Are you gonna keep only speaking out when one of yours die or us?
How about we only talk when you are gunned down and hold a
Vigil or conference.
How would you feel?
Lets be truthful.
Do you only love the publicity that we only get during bad times?
Or is this scripted to go into the history books that’s not ours?
Lets be truthful.
Is what’s being said being heard or overstood?
Are we going to change our own path, instead of knocking on
Some damn old wood?
Lets be truthful
Are you and ours ready for a major change? A real one?
Then lets be truthful to ourselves first and execute.
Now that’s being truthful.
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