Menu
Adrian Mariscal (CA) / California / Poetry

Poetry By Adrian Mariscal

Currents
By Adrian S. Mariscal

She got into my blood,
Got into the flow one cell at a time,
Became inseparable
From the energy stored there
Where atoms vibrate,
And the universe shifts
Back and forth between
Thoughts of God,
She made it
To the center,
Of me,
To the rise and fall
Of every beat
As if the tempo
Was hers all along,
Deviltry of the simplest kind,
A smile a joke,
An adventure in my mind,
Into my blood flowing
Through spine electric,
Up into levels organized eclectic,
Captivated by the dream,
Charmed like sailors unarmed
By songs by sirens,
By the dawn of me and her,
Hiding our smiles,
Disguising our needs,
Feeding the chemistry
Without trying,
Kid-like a play fight
A visit pretend-like
I kept it cool,
Maybe too cool,
Maybe too institutionalized,
Into my blood flowing,
Like poison like fire
Feeding itself unstoppable,
And afterwards,
The embers lie glowing
Under ash mountains, of me,
Waiting for the winds of change
To carry the dream
Into a brand new day,
From this poem into your smile
And back into mine,
My turn to flow like lava
Through every one of your veins
And feel alive, in you,
One with everything we are,
Everything we will become,
Together.

Necessary like Stars
By Adrian S. Mariscal

It’s been a while since I wrote you a letter,
Or a poem waxing philosophical,
Writing to you like a sculptor would
Or an artist touched by the sun,
Do you miss me?
Or do you think of me
Which isn’t the same, but sort of,
Shaping the body of a proposition, or
Riddles for the uninitiated
And you my dear are my skeleton key,
Unlocking all the stars all the universes
And stepping through to casually say hello,
I have brought you another poem I know
You will cherish the melody
As it descends into the abyss of progress,
Where silence falls flat on its face
For the new generation,
And I be like fuck em their soft and indecisive,
They will never appreciate the subtlety
In any one of your smiles,
They will walk the long miles of middle life
Without finding wonder where ever they can,
Necessities and spiritual awakenings,
Burning in places given over to paint
With the dying embers of our hearts,
I am ridiculous because of you
Because of life and nights like this,
Burning through Bukowski
And the last of my thirty something trips around the sun,
Wishing you were here for the convo
For the late night carnival and carnivore in me,
For the kid in me and in you, silly stuff
I know I’m a good rambler who mistakes
A good rant for decent poetry,
Read me anyway and call it the greatest,
Call it sublime or the thoughts of a great mind
With too little oxygen and never fake it,
That is your gift my dear, you find
What is most human and watch it
The way God watches it all
And knows it is all precious,
You my love are no Scarlet produced by romantic fools
Who know nothing of the wasteland and lie,
I would die there a million times
And shock the world every time
When we blossom out of their darkness
With laughter
Mad and deafening.

The Roots of Remorse
By Adrian S. Mariscal
I feed on myself
Like a lunatic left to starve,
Well fed thanks to my
Legs and an arm,
Carving myself to pieces slowly
Preferring to be numb than lonely,
This is my shame and pain that
I don’t want to write with,
History and labels I can’t
Fight with my fist,
So instead I self-mutilate
By asking myself ‘What if?’
Then I self-medicate with rehabilitation,
High off the distance
Separating me at thirty-two,
Self-educated in prison
With me at eighteen,
Acting a fool eager to catch
One of my enemies slipping,
Until the realization of having blood
On my hands forces me to understand
Change is limited by the hemorrhaging,
The constant remembering
By my victims’ family and mine,
The absence bleeds into every moment,
Into every act of love
Planted in a field of dreams
Cratered by nightmares,
Cause life doesn’t fight fair
Or spare any man’s conscience
But even still,
I am responsible,
In every way that makes me human,
For the true justice that doesn’t stop
When you’re placed inside of a box,
To live and to give beyond
The measure of me at eighteen,
And accept there is no balancing
The good and evil we create,
But for now somebody please
Remind Lady Justice to keep
Her blindfold tied tight,
Because the remorse in itself
Is a life sentence,
The remorse itself  is redemption.
The Greatest Actor Alive
By Adrian S. Mariscal
Leave me alone
Along with my masks,
They’re needed to survive the crash,
I have to become something else fast,
Not just to survive but to laugh.
To convince myself my soul
 Hasn’t been cut in half,
To be able to stand my reflection
Without being crippled by questions,
A mask for any occasion,
For any devil waiting to greet me
On any level of devastation,
Like when I lost my trial then
Picked up denial to ignore my fears,
Then I picked up hope
Cause the texture was similar
And wore it for years,
Then a mask with a smile on it
To hide all my tears,
Followed by a stoic white one
To hide the grimace left
After losing my last appeal,
Hell, my masks are more real than me,
Understand me as in the dream
That used to be a sentient being,
Before I distorted my imagination
To find meaning in a box
Where underneath all the static props
And sadistic plots my thoughts,
Like troops, fight to become absolutes,
Fighting to shoot proof on the frontlines
Of action, no longer just afterthoughts.
Or abstractions, unravelling then travelling
From being a shadow of a man
To a shadow that gained traction on land,
Then the upper hand that ripped off
One mask after another,
And another then another
Till nothing was left except
Flesh disfigured by the insanity
Of trying to suffocate my humanity with hate,
Which was fake as hell but
Better late to love than never,
So I plan to keep this one mask
Covered in cracks to help me remember
Never to surrender the light that finally broke through!
All That Is Done Here
By Adrian S. Mariscal
Writing for the sake of writing,
Writing like I’m still fighting my case
And all hope hasn’t been lost,
Unaware of the cost of words
But I can’t afford anything
And I’m not a part of the herd
So I’m down to say anything,
And it can make you feel everything
Or nothing but I don’t even care
Cause I’m just writing for the sake of writing,
Like if I can relate to getting home late
Or flaking on dinner dates, cause I’m 13 years late
And mistakes at this point
Are a loser’s way of having fun,
No point to make, I’m a bum in a box
Screaming at my mind to stop
Every time a thought hops over the fence
And goes on the run,
Rally the troops killer on the loose,
Grab your guns and call in the helicopters,
To hell with the lawyers and doctors,
What this guy needs is a bullet,
Finger on the trigger, clear shot, pull it,
Bring him back dead or alive
But I was gonna come back anyway,
No lie, I’m institutionalized,
Hunting down memories till
There’s nothing left to visualize,
I see an enemy when I see myself
Man I think I’m ready to go blind
I think I’m ready to lose my mind,
Sensory deprivation to go with
Spiritual decimation, tell me,
Am I out of line?
Freak’n running out of time?
Guess I’m finally coming home
To the house of bones
Where all we do is
Write for the sake of writing.
Adrian Mariscal

No Comments

  • Unknown
    June 29, 2020 at 12:23 am

    Adrian, how are you my friend? My apologies for not keeping in touch as of late. Been busy running and ripping and moving all over the place. Finally got my own spot. I'll be sending you a letra soon Carnal. God is faithful my Brother and in his word in the book of Isaiah he says "For a mere moment I turned my face from you but I will show you kindness again." That turning of the face does not mean that God has left us or forsaken us or abondoned us. It just means that for a moment and for a season that God is in the process of disciplining us. Take courage and strength Adrian because we know that those seasons dont last forever. Your time will come Brother and your tears will be turned to joy and your sadness to lauphter. I still remember the things we talked about and I will be contacting you soon. Always in his service Pst. Lucero –

    Reply
  • Bee
    May 20, 2020 at 7:39 pm

    As always my Boy. Beautiful talent you have and I hope it takes you far.

    Reply

Leave a Reply